Complicated (R.S.L/ R5)

Chapter 5

"Ok, I can understand that, but you seriously can't think I would do something... so.. so inhuman, can you?" he asked, seeming shocked by my opinion of him.

"I told you, I honestly don't know at this point. You beat me up on a daily basis, you say the most hurtful things there are, there's seriously very little you haven't done to me at this point."

"Ok, but I wouldn't rape you!" he said, getting more worked up and anxious with every thing I said.

I thought about what he said.

"If you wouldn't, then let me out of here without doing anything to me."

He stepped out of the way immediately, unlocking the door for me. I took a cautious step, hoping he wouldn't suddenly change his mind. I looked at him, but he made no move to stop me. I ran out of his room, and out of their house.

I fumbled for my keys, unlocking the door and slamming it shut, before running into my room. I steadied my breathing, trying to process what had just happened. Rydel had basically told me to accept what he did to me, Ross dragged me into his room and almost raped me, but then let me go.

Why did he let me go?

Who knows? All I should be glad for is that he did let me go, because at this point, I'm honestly convinced he would do something like that to me. But I guess I should apologise to Rydel. All she was doing was trying to help me. I could go over there, but after this, I'm not going there for a long time. I hunted for my cell phone until I found it and called Rydel.

Hello?

Rydel, it's Alyssa. I wanted to apologise for getting so angry at you. I know you were just trying to help me.

Alyssa, it's ok. I know it's a lot to deal with, and I'm sorry for saying it in the way I did.

I'm glad you're being so chill about this. I need to go now, but I'll see you in a few days. I just need to stay away from you guys for a while.

Why?

I'll explain next time I see you, ok?

Ok. Bye.

Bye.

I hung up and lay down on my bed. I was alone, as usual, since my parents were on business trips. They seemed to increase ever since I turned 18, meaning it was legal for me to stay alone. I closed my eyes and thought of happy memories, when Ross didn't hate me. The first ones that came to mind were the promises we made when we were younger.

"Higher!" I squealed.

"Princess, if I push you any higher, you might fall!"

"No Ross, please!"

He sighed and pushed the swing harder.

"Ali, please don't let go. I can't bear to see you get hurt," he cautioned.

I dug my heels into the ground, slowly stopping the swing and getting off cautiously. I walked over to Ross and flung my arms around him.

"Thank you for caring so much," I whispered to him.

"No problem Ali. I'll never hurt you, or let anything hurt you," he said, stroking my hair.

Even at age 8, he was a lot taller than me, so much so that I only came up to his shoulders.

"I love you Alyssa," he whispered.

"I love you too Ross."

Unknowingly, I had tears running down my face as I remembered all the times that we spent together, when neither of us hated the other. I had another memory of when we were 13, a few days before our argument.

I sat curled up on the sofa, waiting for Ross to come over. I had already got all the popcorn and movies ready for our weekly movie marathon. Finally, I heard a knock on the door and I went to open it. There I saw Ross, blotchy faced with tears running down his face. I gasped and pulled him inside.

"Ross, what happened?"

He sniffled and looked at me.

"Nothing, it's fine," he said.

I rolled my eyes.

"Nothing is not the reason you're crying. Now tell me."

"Ok, so... I have a crush on this girl who is way out of my league, and my brothers know about it, and they were teasing me, and saying things like that I'll never have a chance with her, and I'll never be able to go out with me because she's too good for me," he cried.

Seeing him cry was breaking my heart as well. I reached forward and wiped his cheeks.

"Don't listen to them. If anything, you're too good for her. No matter how special she may be, she can never be too good for you, or even good enough for you," I told him.

"She is though! She's way too good for me, and I'm never going to be able to tell her. And even if I do, she will never say yes to going out with me," he said miserably.

"Ross, calm down. Listen to me, if she does that, she doesn't deserve you. She's not worth your tears," I said.

He nodded and pulled me close for a hug, clinging to me.

"It's ok," I soothed.

I paused.

"Ross, promise me one thing?"

"Of course Ali."

"When you get this girl, who is apparently so amazing you're crying over her, please don't leave me? Like, don't forget about me, please? Promise me?"

At that he sat up straight and looked at me in disbelief.

"Alyssa, I could never forget about you. You're my best friend, and nothing can change that."

I nodded and hugged him, his words reassuring me.

I sat up straight, full out sobbing now. I missed those memories, the moments where it was just us. And what hurt more was knowing that the promises we made, were being broken by him every day.

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