One Kiss Later (K. Baudelaire)

Chapter 7

Klaus

"He found us again. Everywhere we go, he shows up to steal our fortune." I exclaim to Violet. "How can he get our fortune as a gym teacher?" Violet asks, setting Sunny down. "There's treachery lurking most exercise programs." I say aimlessly. "I can't believe he fooled everyone again." Violet worries to me. "Not everyone." Duncan says opening our shack door.

"Don't worry, Baudelaires. Don't feel disgrace. The Quagmire Triplets are on the case." Isadora says with pride. "Candie's at the library trying to find that book we were looking for earlier." Duncan says closing the door behind him. "You're kind and generous friends but we can't let you get involved." Violet warns the Quagmire triplets. "Violet's right. Olaf is too dangerous." I try to reason.

"Precisely Baudelaires, good work. But he's also too dangerous to face alone." Candie says, standing in the doorway, if you could even call it that, holding a basket with food. "Did you find the book?" I ask eagerly. "I'm sorry Baudelaires, I didn't." She says softly. "We can run away. All of us." "I made Candie get supplies." Duncan informs us. "Wait... I didn't know about any running away." Candie says confused.

"Our parents own the famous Quagmire Sapphires, so when we come of age, we can live on our own." Isadora says, ignoring Candie. "I'm not running away." Candie adds. "Candie, you're the one who has been wanting to get out of this school the most." Duncan points out. "Because I want to run toward something. Not away." She says, clearly frustrated. "Candie's right. Plus, we're not of age yet. Besides, we tried running away, and ended up working in a lumber mill. Count Olaf still found us there." I say looking at her and then to the picture of our parents that we found.

"That's a picture of our parents." Isadora says promptly. "Our parents, too" Violet compares. "They did know each other." I say, still looking at the picture. "We had this photo in our library. We never paid attention to it." Isadora explains. "I bet there were other mysteries we never noticed." Duncan says looking back at me. "Like a spyglass." Violet suggests. "Or a book." I suggest, "We just need to survive Count Olaf long enough to find it." "The librarian said to check back in a day or so." Duncan says. "We don't have a day or so. It's almost sundown." Violet says frantically.

A timer went off from Candie's pocket. She turned around and grabbed the timer out of her pocket and quickly turned it off. "Oh, I have to go." She said, picking up her basket, "Well. If you need anything Baudelaires, you know who to call." she smiled at me. She started to walk out before she was interrupted by a board with the letters CS on it and none other than Carmelita Spats walking up.

"I'm here to deliver a special message to the Baudelaires. "Carmelita, please." Candie says in an attempt to get through the door. She gave candy a scary look, Candie backed up.

"The sun is setting, hooray, hooray.

Coach Genghis sent me here to say The Baudelaire orphans to to the field

And my name is Carmelita!

We all cringed as she sang until Isadora spoke up. "It doesn't even rhyme." "Only cake-sniffers care about poetic form. Candie rolled her eyes before leaving and following her sister.

"Punctuation, orphans, punctuation." Count Olaf says we walked in. "Punctuation?" Violet questions as we stop in front of him. "The art of arriving not late." He explains incorrectly. "That's punctuality." I correct, "And you said to be here at sundown. We're not late." He gives us a smirk. "That's curious, someone just referred to you as the late Baudelaires. Maybe they were talking about your parents." He threatened. Me and Violet gave each other a look. "That reminds me of a story that I'm going to tell you. Some years ago, a set of wealthy children came to me, needing my help." Count Olaf explained, "There were three of them, One of each. Girl, boy and baby. "Coach Genghis," they said to me, "we're failures. Our parents have abandoned us for careers as burnt-up skeletons. We have nothing in our lives but all these bags of money, and they're making us failures who read books and stuff.' And do you know what I told them?"

Vice Principal Nero raised he hand quickly like a know-it-all school girl. "I think I know this one. Did you tell them to stand up?" Vice Principal Nero asked. "They were already standing." Count Olaf says annoyed. "To actualize and incentivize?" Vice Principal Nero asked again. "That doesn't even mean anything." Count Olaf says getting more and more irritated. me and Violet exchange looks. "I told them to put on some very expensive running shoes and then to take this bucket of luminous paint. Luminous is a word I made up meaning to glow in the dark." Count Olaf says throwing us running shoes. "We know what 'luminous' means." I inform. "And then they are to drag this bucket around and around until they have made a luminous circle on the ground." Count Olaf says ignoring my statement. "That's it?" Vice Principal Nero questioned. "Genius ideas are simple, like the wheel or neurosurgery." Count Olaf explained to Vice Principal Nero.

"The orphans will run around and around and around, exercising their mother and father-less legs." Count Olaf says wickedly, turning back to us. "Um, okay, but what are you going to tell the Baudelaires to do?" Vice Principal Nero says cluelessly. "What am I- It's the same." Count Olaf says getting irritated again. "What's the same." Me and Violet exchanged looks and looked back to Count Olaf and Vice Principal Nero.

"Isn't it time or your little light to shine?" Count Olaf says, trying to change the subject. "Oh, I need a few minutes to rosin my bow." Vice Principal Nero says running off. "Don't say that in front of the children." Count Olaf says as he walks off. I roll my eyes at his immaturity and cluelessness. Whatever you're up to Olaf, we will-" Violet says before being cut off by a whistle.

Candie

I look at the grand clock. 5:45. I sigh. I guess he forgot. I got up and dusted my dress off. I start walking to the dormitories until I hear my sisters tap shoes on the hard concrete floor. I turn around to see her stop dead in her tracks. She walked into the cafeteria. "Carmelita? Where are you going?" I say rushing after her. "Carmelita?" I whisper-yell.

"Well, well, if it isn't cake-sniffer and his cake-sniffing friend." Carmelita say walking toward someone. I followed her voice and stopped dead in my tracks. I stood a good distance behind Carmelita and observed. I saw a tall man with a mustache holding a man that looked to frozen alive. "You must be Carmelita Spats. And your sister Candie Spats."

He says looking to me. I step forward. Carmelita turns around to face me. She rolled her eyes and scoffed, turning back to the man with a mustache. "If you don't mind me asking, how do you know who I am?" I ask stepping a little closer to the man and my sister. "I work for an organization that keeps tabs on young people of interest." The man says.

"Well, obviously, I'm interesting." Carmelita sassed. "Interesting can mean very different things." The man starts, "A polka-dot suit is interesting but no one looks good in one. Just as you and your sister are very interesting yet, for different reasons. This man here is my friend, and I don't appreciate anyone mistreating my friend, no matter what age they are." The man started to walk toward and past us. "I'm sorry, sir." I say as he walks by.

"No hard feelings Candie, oh and by the way, I believe it takes one to know one. Cake-sniffer." He says looking to my sister. Carmelita crossed her arms and stomped off.