Brandon and Billie: Oneshots

Practice makes Perfect

Title:Practice makes perfect
Pairings/Characters:Brandon&Billie, Maggie(mentioned)
Genre:Humour, Romance, Soft
Age:24&29
Summary:Maggie gives Billie some...advice.

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Billie stormed into her and Brandon's home seething and pissed off beyond belief. She slammed the door shut and tossed her keys on the kitchen counter with a soft growl under her breath. Brandon watched her with a raised brow, used to her coming home angry for various reasons, but still a little wary of her turning her temper on him.

"Hey" he greeted with a smile, mixing the pot on the stove. "How was shopping with your mom?"

"Terrible" she tossed off her jacket and flung it haphazardly on the sofa before stepping out of her shoes and approaching the kitchen island.

"What happened?"

"My mom and I went to a quaint little lunch place thingy to try and avoid the paparazzi" She said, waving her hands about dismissively, "There were all these women with babies and young children taking a break there too."

"That sounds nice"

"It wasn't" her lip curled. "Normally I love babies, but my mom was so obsessed with them and was cooing at them and her being her annoying self and-"

"How is that so bad?" he asked, peering inside the oven to check on the food, "Aren't you use to it by now?"

"Yeah, I'm used to that and fine with it because again, babies are cute" she said, rolling her eyes. "What I'm not use to is the subject that came after that"

"What came after?"

"The subject of grandkids. As in, when she'll get hers."

Brandon straigtened and stared at her, eyebrow raised a little in amusement.

"She wouldn't shut up about wanting grandkids. She was like 'I'm getting old Billie. I want to be able to pick up your future children." Billie said, affecting her mother's dramatic method of speaking, "Every other second! Even when the waiter came to take our order, she brought it up, asking him if he thought I should have kids. He gave me the number for a damn sperm bank."

Brandon chuckled quietly, looking for the bottle of wine in the pantry. "But Maggie always says stuff like that. She brought it up at dinner last week too"

"While, yes, it's not uncommon for her to bring it up, this time, she went too far" Billie said in a low tone, her eyes shining in disgust.

"What did she do?"

"She used my cycle to get her gynecologist to map out my most fertile days and basically told the whole world that next week would be a perfect time to 'breed'. It was embarrassing!"

He walked back to the stove, pouring a little wine into a pan on the stove. "Ehhh. Thats nasty. It couldn't have been that bad, baby"

"It was. Take a look at this"

Billie rummaged in her bag, shifting aside old receipts and clutter until she found what she had been looking for. She yanked a small book out and tossed it across the counter towards him.

Brandon wiped his hands on a dish towel and picked it up, reading the cover. "Twenty-one Different Ways To Maximise Fertilization."

"You see that bullshit?"

He laughed, shaking his head in mirth. "Your mom is something else."

"Read the title of chapter sixteen"

He peered inside, flipping to the indicated chapter.

"How to train your sperm to survive in even the mostly deadly of vaginas." Brandon frowned. "That's, uh...interesting"

"She does this crap all the time!" Billie threw her hands up in frustration. "Remember when she swapped our condoms out with expired ones 3 years ago?"

He winced, remembering how shaken up Billie had gotten after one of them had broken. That had led to the grueling Summer of Celibacy.

"Yeah."

"And then when she tried to switch my birth control with peppermints earlier this year? I've had it!"

Brandon could tell Billie was getting pretty upset about the whole thing.

"Billie, she was probably just playing around today. Don't take it heart."

"No. I'm done with her. Does she think this is funny?" Billie growled. "We just tied the knot a month ago. Why the hell is she so insistent on me having damn kids as soon as possible? Why can't she bother Claudia and Finneas about this shit."

Brandon cut off the oven and stove with a sigh and walked around the island to Billie. He wrapped his arms around her waist and held her to him, kissing her softly on the forehead.

"She just wants the best for you. And maybe she thinks a baby will be just that"

She frowned in concern, fiddling with a button on his shirt. "Yeah, but why does she think I'm ready to be a mom.. I can barely take care of myself."

"Maybe she sees something in you that tells her you are" He cradled her face in his hand, rubbing her cheek gently. "Do you think you're ready"

"I honestly don't know. Part of me says I want a kid of my own, and the other part of me is scared too. I've always wanted kids young, but now that it finally could be possible, I'm freaking out a little bit."

"Billie. I know you would make an amazing mother because you are the most selfless person there is on this earth." He tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear. "Don't freak out about it. Whatever you decide, I'll support your decision."

"Do you want kids?" she asked cautiously, meeting his gaze anxiously.

"You know I would love to have a few mini-Billie's running around" Brandon shrugged with a smile. "But I'm willing to wait until you're ready"

"Thank you." she leaned up and pressed her lips chastely against his. "You're the best"

"Anything for my beautiful Mamas"

She snuggled against his chest, "You know it could be pretty long wait, right?"

"I don't mind. Although..." he said playfully, sliding his hands over her ass and whispering suggestively in her ear, "More practice until it's time wouldn't hurt."

"What?"

"Your mom did give us a book with some great tips" He nuzzled her neck, lightly brushing the skin with his lips. "We should try them all out" He kissed a low, deliberate trail up her neck to her ear. "Right now" He bit the lobe, tugging on it. "After all, I need to train my sperm, don't I?"

Billie blushed, involuntary pressing herself closer to him. No matter how long she'd been with Brandon, her body could never get used to his kisses.

"I have to write" She sighed, breath catching a bit when his mouth grazed over a sensitive part of her neck.

"That can wait" He caught her chin and gave her a languid, heat-filled kiss that momentarily blurred her focus and made her knees go weak.

"...What about dinner?"

"You're all the dinner I need, Billie" He said, teasing the skin of her exposed flesh under her shirt.

"You're a weirdo"

But she laughed as he scooped her up and tossed her onto the couch, crawling on top of her with a naughty grin.

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No update so long, sorry.

Sad cause a year ago today I saw Billie in concert and a year ago today she was playing bleaupro on repeat but anyway