After the Drift

Chapter Nineteen: Christmas

I had caught up with Lucie not long after dinner with my parents.

I snagged her elbow and steered her to the edge of the hallway. She grumbled the entire way.

"Why are you so up my butt, tubs?"

"Why are you avoiding your family like the plague?" I retorted.

She scoffed. "You and I aren't even remotely on the same wavelength. Obviously. So you wouldn't understand." She pulled her arm away from me.

"We share a room now, tubs. And two parents. Nothing else. You ruined everything. Your crush on Chuck. Being totally inept. Your. Fault." She poked me in the chest. "But I'm going to fix it. I'm going to be where I deserve. You can rot for all I care."

She stormed away from me. My mouth hung open. I felt gutted. Again.

I swallowed hard and shoved my fists into my pockets. I stomped to the library, the only quiet place where I knew no one I knew would be.

I found a few journals about marine animals and the harmful effects of kaiju on them... some light reading.

I stayed there for a few hours, my mind getting lost between the poor creatures the big nasties were hurting, the new baby and my sister problems.

I still felt so happy for the new Blackwell. I would take everything I learned from Lucie and I'd relationship and do the exact opposite. I would be the best big sister I could be.

I wiped a few stray tears away as I finally left around midnight. Today was Christmas Eve. Or maybe it was Christmas now.

Hopefully my parents were together and my friends were with their loved ones. I was just better alone.

My parents had each other. They thought since they had two kids they were pre-made lifelong friends. Unfortunately, they were wrong about us.

So here I was. Alone on the holiday you spent with those you loved. I loved books, so I guess that kinda counts.

I clutched the journal I hadn't finished yet to my chest, looking at the floor as I walked towards our suite. Lucie was rarely there anymore. But it still felt awkward to be there.

As I neared the door, I noticed a large silhouette in the dimmed lighting.

I came closer and saw someone writing in a card, tucking it in a red envelope and pushing it under the door.

They turned and stopped short.

"Merry Christmas, Little One." Came a breathy greeting. The side of his cheek lifted with a little smile.

Everything came rushing at me at once. All the hurt. All the loneliness. The feeling of failure. The feeling of wanting to be accepted and wanted.

I started sobbing. Wracking, heartbreaking sobs left me.

Chuck didn't even pause.

He immediately came and held me tightly in his arms. He rubbed my back and muttered soothing phrases.

"I'm so sorry, Little One. I would never wish whatever pain you're in on ya. Shh, sweet one."

He laid his hand on the back of my head and pushed me into the crook of his neck. I burrowed deeper into him.

I just wanted him to want me back. No one ever chose me.

"I do choose you, Ruby. Damnit." He pulled back and held my face in the palms of his hands. My face blank with a bit of shock.

I must have spoken those words out loud.

"Ever since you ran into me, you're all I think about. All day. All night." His eyes were hard, but his grip on my face remained gentle.

"B-but, my sis-sister." I sobbed.

He shook his head. "I got real real drunk, darl. I won't lie to you. She found me sitting in the Jaeger bay with maybe a quarter bottle of whiskey left. I don't know what the hell I said... or did..."

He took a ragged breath. "I just wanted you, Ruby. To find me. Save me. Sass me and make everything better."

This beautiful man looked so sad. So full of regret.

I did the only thing I could.

I kissed him.

I sprung up, grabbed his face and kissed him hard. My tear streaked face pushed up against his.

He instantly grabbed onto my hips, pushing me into the wall. He ground his hips into mine, kissing me back feverishly.

I kissed him back with the same intensity.

I believed him. I wanted him.

This harsh, abrasive man who missed his mother. Who wanted to make his father proud. Who wanted only me.

Well, he also wanted a damn puppy. He was such a closet softie.

I wanted that man in so many ways.

"My room, Chuck." I said breathlessly as I jumped off him and swiped into my thankfully empty room.