Warnings: Lots of Swears, Fighting, and a Shit Load of Angst with a Semi-Happy Ending
Based on the song by NF
She knew it wasn't going to be easy. Normal relationships aren't easy. She knew she'd have to have a little more patience than usual, be more understanding than usual. But she thought she could do it, she really did. But maybe that was just her reckless teenage self talking, the one that was head over heels for a boy.
...
I know that I can be a difficult person
I'm a stress case, drive you up the wall when I'm workin'
Actually, I'm probably worse when I'm not, you don't deserve it
They had been here before. Lately it had felt like they were always here when they were with each other. Peter wasn't home when Y/N was, and Y/N wasn't home when Peter was. But that rare occasion when they do manage to cross paths in their apartment, well, it was better when they were just alone. Peter was tugging his hair with both hands, needing to do something to get out the anger that was building up in him. "I don't understand what you want from me." Peter said trying his best to keep his voice level. "You knew what you were signing up for when you started dating me, when we moved in together." Y/N just looked at him with her arms crossed on her chest, trying her best to hold the tears in. "I get it. I'm not home and when I am I'm busy with school and work. I know when I'm out being Spider-Man, you worry and stress. But this is what you signed up for, Y/N. I know I'm difficult, but you told me you loved me and you'd deal with the rest as long as we were together." Peter said bringing his hands back down to his side in defeat.
Make you nervous 'cause you know I'ma break soon
Every time I do, I say somethin' that hurts you
Actin' like I'm gone, but we both in the same room
I don't like to be wrong, which I know you relate to
"I'm sorry for what I said to you, I am. But I'm human too. People make me out to be this amazing guy that saves the world, gets an education, and is the perfect boyfriend all at the same time. And I try to be, I really do, but I've been breaking down lately. Just the pressure of everything, the pressure people put on me, of having to live up to Tony, of doing well in school, of being there for you, it becomes too much, and I break. And then I say something that hurts you." When Peter brought his eyes up to meet Y/N's, she just looked at him with an unreadable look on her face, before scoffing and walking into the kitchen. Exasperated, Peter followed her as she got out a glass for water. "So what, you're just going to ignore me now? Act like I'm not even here, when I'm literally standing two feet away from you? I get it, what I said hurt you and I was wrong, I admit it, but you aren't being any better right now. We're both wrong here, so can we please just talk it out?"
And I know I make you feel like you're at the end of your rope
That's when I look at you and tell you I'd be better alone
Just the pride talkin', isn't it? 'Cause both of us know
I'm the definition of "wreck" if you look into my soul
Comes out the most when I feel I'm in a vulnerable place
Y/N still wasn't looking at him, or talking to him, but Peter knew that he was riling her up, judging by the way her knuckles started to turn white from the death grip she had on her glass. But the fact that she still refused to say a word snapped something in Peter, and suddenly all the calm he worked so hard to keep, rushed out of him. "You know what Y/N, fuck this. You know that Spider-Man is important to me, and it's something I have to do. I'm not going to give that up, especially when so many people depend on me, and right now it just feels like you're holding me back. I'm sorry that I'm out there busting my ass to save the city every day, and you're just here blaming me for doing the right thing. It's not my fault you're so damn clingy, and constantly need my attention. Well guess what Y/N? My world doesn't reveille around you! I have a life outside of you! And I'm sorry that you can't fucking understand that. Maybe I'd just be better alone, without someone constantly there doing nothing except holding me back from my life and what I need to do." Peter had no idea where that came from, and almost immediately regretted the words as soon as it came out of his mouth, because it wasn't even close to true. No, that was just his pride talking, because Y/N didn't hold him back. If anything she was the one holding him together, because without her, he'd be nothing but a wreck.
