Reluctant Heroes: Levi x Reader (Erwin's daughter)

Chapter 32- The ring

After the rather intense discussion I had just had with my father, I needed to be alone with my thoughts. I sat on the steps outside, away from everyone else. They were all most likely in the mess hall, since it was dinner time. I should have been hungry, seeing how I hadn't eaten anything all day, but I was much too anxious to eat or interact with anyone. I had a lot to process. It felt like my whole world had just caved in on me. My head was also killing me, probably due to all the crying, and maybe because I had never had such an intense conversation before.

Yet again, my mind had been blown. I was actually shaking from the adrenaline I had. Maybe it wasn't even adrenaline, it could have just been anxiousness. As I sat there fidgeting, I thought about the ring. I took out the ring and began fiddling around with it. That's when my mind started racing.

'What if mom had stayed with dad and they actually got married? How different would my life have been? First of all, I would have grown up with a dad. Second of all, we wouldn't have lived in Shiganshina, where the titans first breached. Shit... if we hadn't lived there... mom would still be alive. Mom would be alive today if she had just gone through with it. I mean, so what if dad was a little messed up? She was pretty messed up too. And hell, so am I, I literally killed a man and mom didn't seem to think too much about it. If she had married him, I probably never would have done that. I probably wouldn't have joined the military either. I had no desire to join before all of this, and I already knew dad was a soldier. Mom and I would have been safe inside the walls while dad was out on expeditions. I would have had a fairly normal life. It would have just been the same as all the other soldiers that have families. I just don't get why she made such a big deal about it. She didn't want me being influenced by him? That's bullshit. It's not like she was some saint. God damn it mom, why did you do this? Why couldn't you have just married my father?'

After being lost in my thoughts, I looked down at the ring again. The ring that could have changed everything. I don't know what came over me, maybe it was anger or frustration, but I stood up and threw the ring as hard as I could. It went pretty far and landed somewhere way down the steps from where I stood. Coming to my senses, I almost immediately regretted throwing it.

"Shit... shit!" I cursed before running down the steps to find it. I had a general idea of where it had landed, but it was getting pretty dark, which made it hard to see. I searched around the dimly lit area step by step. I spent a decent amount of time looking for it, going up and down the steps and searching every nook and cranny. As I looked, I thought about mom again. 'Ugh, why did I do that? I can't lose that ring... it's the only thing I have of hers. I don't have time to waste being angry. It's all in the past, and I can't change anything now. Even if I don't agree with her, mom had her reasons for doing what she did. She did everything to give me a good life... and I did live a fairly peaceful life before all of this. Hey, that's it!'

At last, I found the ring. I sighed in relief as I held it once again. 'What would it be like to be engaged.... I wonder if Levi would ever-'

"Ahh!" I yelped as my thoughts were interrupted by a hand gripping my shoulder. "Oh no!" I dropped the ring again at the sudden shock, and quickly went after it. "What is it with people sneaking up on me today?!"

"Oi, what are you doing?" I could instantly tell it was Levi from the stern voice.

"Ugh, you made me drop the goddamn ring!" I answered in frustration as I searched for it yet again.

"What ring?"

"It was my mom's ring. Ah, here it is," I picked up the ring and gripped it in my hand firmly.

"Sorry," he apologized calmly, making me feel slightly guilty for snapping at him. After taking a moment to cool off, I remembered I hadn't seen him all day, so I surprised him by running up and wrapping my arms around him and I buried my face in his shoulder. After the initial shock, he wrapped his arms around me too and asked "are you alright?" to which I simply nodded in response. "I take it you spoke with your dad? I noticed the two of you skipped out on dinner."

"Mhm," I lazily groaned. At this point, he tried to pull away from the hug, but I didn't want to let go. I was basically using him to stand, since I felt so drained from all the crying, searching, thinking, and not eating anything all day. "Levi?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm hungry," I complained as I finally let him escape from my hold.

"Tch." He rolled his eyes and smirked. "Fine, let's try to find you something to eat then." He turned and began walking away, so I caught up with him quickly and linked arms with him as we made our way to the kitchen.