Betrayal with Me (Spin-off)

[19]: Tribulations

[Scott's POV]

The cashier is handing me back my card after running it through the machine for me to pay for my coffee. Sliding it back into my wallet, I lift the back of my suit jacket to slide it back into my back pocket. I smile at the cashier, and murmur a thank you to her. She dashes her lashes at me in a flirtatious manner, and responds with a you're welcome. In a lifetime before this, I would have taken her up on the suggestive come hither vibes she was radiating off of her. A lifetime ago, when I had lost all morals and guilt. A time when I was a lesser man. To be honest, I probably am a lesser man still.

She hands me my coffee, and lightly covers my fingers with her own as she hands it to me. I know it's not an accidental act. It had purpose and meaning to it. As a matter of fact, this hasn't been the only time she has done something like this. Even the gold band that sits on my left ring finger hasn't deterred her for her sexual innuendos. It's a little grotesque to realize that there are so many women out in this world that just don't give a shit about boundaries. Their sexual wants and needs bypassing all sense of morality. Did I have a right to be disgusted with these women, when I had been a willing participant in their hedonistic actions as well?

I know the answer to that question already. I am the pot, and they are the kettle. All I can do now, is try and be the man I know I can be. All I can do is somehow live the rest of my life making up for my debaucherous actions of the past. All I can do is prove to everyone and anyone whom would listen, that I wasn't that man anymore. The most important person I had to show that to, will always be Elise.

But how exactly do I prove that to her, when every thing I try to do is quickly obstructed? I stopped trying to call and write Elise as soon as I realized all my attempts had been in vain. I knew that every letter and phone call was never received, at least not by her. I knew the culprit behind the denial of my communications were, Laura. Could I really blame her for what she did? Did I have a right to be angry with her? No, but it didn't stop me from feeling defeated. Try as I might, there was so much I had done wrong, so why should Laura trust me if Elise couldn't as well?

Turning around with my coffee in hand, I looked out the panoramic view of the street outside that the large plains of glass in the front provided. Fall was beginning to ascend on Goldendale, and some of the decorative trees that had been planted, were now beginning to turn shades of gold and red. Elise had been back home for over three months now, give or take a few days. Was she back for good? And if she wasn't, how much more time did I have to change her views on the man I am?

As if my mind conjured her to life, I watch her walking across the street as I am leaving the coffee shop. Her cheeks are rosy from the chilled air. Her hands are tucked tightly in the front of her jacket, as she huddles into herself to keep the coldness from seeping into her bones. My instincts are to run to her, and that is what my feet do. I look left, then right to make sure there are no cars coming my way, and just as I am about to step off the curb, I see him. He is exiting the pharmacy across the street, and I notice how she immediately runs to him. I watch transfixed on the vision in front of me, as he wraps an arm around her giving her some of his warmth. I see him lean down and give an affectionate kiss on her forehead, and how she swats at him playfully. Her smile that once belonged to me, shining up at him. I hear her melodic laugh fill the air. Just then, they begin walking down the street, his arm snaked around her waist and hers around his.

I could blame the jealousy and rage on my inner wolf, at seeing her like this with another man. I could say it was my pride that was causing me to have this visceral response to her being so intimate with another man. But I know it would be a lie. These feelings came from the man, himself. It stemmed from the love I had for this beautiful woman. That man had no right to feel and act this way, but still, he did. That man could only blame himself for these feelings anyways, since he was the reason why that other man was here in the first place.