Five Years Back

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        They had been so much love between them. It was madness. They had gone to goa and spent a passionate week there. He had shown the heights of intimacy which she had never imagined exited. And her innocence and her craze to excite him until he explode would make him fall in love with her all over again. They had made love on an empty beach, under open sky and beneath stars, in the hall and the dinning hall. He had taken her on the yatch. They had ended up making love on the deck. He was sexy, he was fun, he was caring, he was loving and she was insatiable. Sana has consulted her gynac for conceptive pills. Sid had asked her about it. He had told her they can use protection if she is not comfortable with taking pills. But she has insisted she will take care in that department and he need not worry. Sana just for fun once asked
Sana: Aur agar mai kabhi pregnant ho gayi to
Sid: Aise kabhi nhi hona chahiye. Agar tujse manage nhi hota to muje bol. Hamare paas dusra alternative hai.
Sana: Tuje kabhi nhi chahiye bacche??
Sid: Nahi abhi to nhi chahiye.
    Sana had felt a bit sad but she let it go. They was so much they had to discover about each other. They came back from goa. Sid would spend all weekends with her. They would make love, laze around, cook together.  Life was full of love. They worked hard and had evening and nights for each other. Even if he was not with her at night they would talk on fone until the wee hours of the morning. They couldn't get enough of each other. Sana had missed her periods. She thought it was due to some work stress. She was not feeling well for past two days. She had nausea and felt tired easily. Doubt flickered in her mind. She ordered a pregnancy kit from the medical store. The result showed she was pregnant. She sat in the bathroom not knowing what to do. She might have skipped the pill when they were in goa. What was she going to do. She knew what Sid felt. But she had to talk to him.
    Sid came to meet her that day. He had known she was not well. He entered the door and hugged her with so much love that she felt a tear drop from her eye.
Sid: Kya hua moti. Tu thek nhi hai ?? Doctor ke paas chale
Sana: Nahi nahi mai thek hu. Matlab ab thek hu.
Sid: Accha kuch khaya??
Sana: Nahi mann nhi hai. Tera leye chai bolu??
Sid: Ha bol de.
    Sana told her maid to get tea for Sid. Sid laid on the sofa. Relaxing with his eyes closed
Sid: Tu nhi piyegi??
Sana: Mann nhi kar raha.
Sid: Tu thek hai na??
Sana: Ha ha. Vo mere ek friend ka call aaya tha Punjab se. Us baare me sooch rahi the.
Sid: Kya hua tere friend ko.
Sana: Vo actually pregnant ho gayi hai aur uske husband ko baccha nhi chahiye.
Sid: Dhyaan rakhna chahiye tha dono ne.
Sana: Nahi vo pills le rahi the
Sid: To usne dhyaan rakhna chahiye tha. Agar dono me se ek ko baccha nhi chahiye to dusre ne us baat ki respect rakhni chahiye. Baccha ek bahot badi zimmedari hai.
Sana: To tuje bacche nhi chahiye??
Sid: Mere life me to bilkul bhi ab koi bacche ke leye jagah nhi hai. Bahot projects bahot kaam karna hai. Yeh bandish nhi chahiye. Tu dhyaan rakhna us baat ka ha please. Koi problem na ho.
Sana: Ha dyaan rakhungi.
    She had been disturbed the whole night. Sid had stayed with her. She was restless and he was all loving and caring. They even made love on Sana's insistence. How was she going to tell him she was pregnant with his child. He didnt want any distractions. Sid left in the morning. He had insisted they go see a doctor but she had refused. Sana cancelled her shoot that day and called in sick. She had a lot of thinking to do. Should she abort the baby?? she thought. No. She will never do that. Sid had said clearly he didn't want it. Why should she impose a child on him, if he is not ready for it. It would not be fair on him or her or the child. Which means she will have to go away from his life. But she loved him so much. But again she felt love for the flesh and blood growing inside her. She wants this baby. She decided.  She had a plan. She called shefali and told her to come immediately. Shefali came. Sana told her the plan. She was crying as she was telling her.
Shefali: Sana tu pagal hai?? Yeh sab kyu kar rahi hai
Sana: Shefali muje yeh baccha chahiye aur use nhi chahiye to kya kare bata.
Shefali: Aur Sid se jo tu itna pyar karti hai uska kya??
Sana: Shefali yeh baccha bhi usse ka hai na. Aur mai is bacche ko nhi maar sakti. Par mai nhi chahti vo majburi me isse apnaya.
Shefali: Iska matlab samaj rahi hai tu. Tuje Sid ko khona padega.
Sana: Ek baar usne muje mere career ke leye choda tha. Aaj mai usse uske career ke leye chod rahi hu.
Shefali: Aur reh paayegi uske bagair.
Sana: Yeh Siddharth ka baby hai shefali. Tu samaj na. Aur mera. Hum dono ka. Mai to ise bahot payar karti hu. Kaise ise kho do.
Shefali: To ek baar Sid se baat karle
Sana: Vo nhi chahta baccha yaar. Kaise ise thop du mai fir uspar.
     Sana started crying again. Life was mess. Why does it always have to be like this with her and Sid?? She felt this was the only way. Sid was afraid of commitment. What if he never asks her to marry?? If he never wants a baby?? She wanted this baby. She will not lose it. She will give birth to this baby alone. Without him knowing.

Sidnaaz- The Emotional Saga- Epilogue (Completed) Wo Geschichten leben. Entdecke jetzt