Ethan x Reader

Lies...or not?

A few days later, on Friday, I was chilling in my backyard watching youtube. It was a warm sunny afternoon, so I had decided to enjoy some outdoors time. I heard someone call my name and looked up to see Bailey on his porch looking over to me. He waved, and I waved back. He motioned for me to come over, and so I got up, leapt the fence separating our property from the boys', and walked over. "Hey, Esme." Bailey greeted me. "Hey," I said back. "Nice day isn't it?" He nodded while leaning on the railing of his porch. "I've been wondering something," he said softly, and I gazed at him in slight confusion. "I noticed you've been hanging out with Ethan a ton since you moved here," I nodded slowly, dreading the thought of this conversation going where I thought it was headed. "I was just wondering if, you know. There's something between you?" I closed my eyes briefly, taking a deep breath. Then I opened my eyes and firmly shook my head. "No. We're just friends." Bailey didn't seem convinced. "Are you sure? There's no shame in admitting it." I shook my head again. Bailey shrugged casually. "I don't mind. Ethan's a great guy. I can understand why you'd like him."
For some reason, something inside me snapped. "I just told you we're just friends!" I retaliated with aggression. "Can't you accept that?" Bailey looked quite taken aback by my tone, and I immediately regretted getting upset. "Bailey, I'm sor-" But he cut me off. "No it's fine. I'll just not mention it. I should get back inside." He added quickly, and turned to his backyard door. He went inside and shut the door, and I took the cue to hop the fence back to my property. I felt bad for snapping at Bailey. He didn't do anything wrong, he was just curious! A wave of guilt washed over me. Goddammit Esme! I yelled at myself internally. You're letting your own emotions and memories about the past get the better of you! I clenched my fists as I sat down on the steps of my porch. I had to control my emotions. But how could I, when every time I thought of Ethan, my heart started racing? I needed to focus on other things. I decided that the best course of action would be to not spend as much time with Ethan. So I grabbed my phone and texted him, Hey sorry, I can't come over to stream today. I've got stuff to do today. I felt regret at saying that, but I knew it would only last a little bit of time. If I stopped seeimg Ethan as much, then it would be easy to get rid of any feelings that had sprung up. Right? I sighed, got up and went inside, and tried to forget about it all.

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The next week, I spent most of my time doing stuff around the house. I became extra helpful in cleaning the house, and I even offered Eric to do his chores every day that week, so that I'd constantly be busy. I took up a hobby of graphic design, and spent many hours a day creating realistic images of landscapes, animals, and famous tourist attractions. By Friday that week, I had done a lot, and hadn't gone over to Ethan's house the entire week. He texted me a few times, but I didn't respond. Now it was Saturday evening, and I was in my room, putting the last finishing touches on a drawing of a fish leaping out of a river. I was very proud of it, and was admiring my work when I heard my dad's voice from downstairs. I got up and headed downstairs. "Honey, can you take the garbage out?" My dad asked when I got to the kitchen. He was making dinner because my mom was working late that night. I nodded cheerfully. "Of course, Dad." I said with a smile. He smiled back as I picked up the medium-sizee green bag and headed outside. I brought it to the garbage pail that was on the curb. It took a bit of effort to lift, so when I heaved it up inside, my phone, which had been loosely placed in my tiny jean shorts pocket, fell out and clattered to the ground. I turned to pick it up, but instead of seeing the pavement and my phone, I saw Ethan, holding my phone out to me. I felt my heart drop as I took it, mumbling "Thanks" under my breath. I hurridly turned to go back inside, but Ethan called, "Hey, are you free to come watch movie night with me? It'd be funner with you there." I turned to him, shaking my head. "No! I mean-I need to walk my dog." I blundered quickly, trying to find an excuse. Ethan looked confused, then a bit suspicious. "Esme, you don't have a dog. You told me you're allergic to them." I stuttered, my heart pounding. "Uh-right. I need to feed my uh fish." I said, remembering my fish drawing. "You don't have a fish either. You said you're family doesn't like keeping fish as pets because it confines them too much." I found myself at a loss for words. Ethan came to me, grabbing my hand. I pulled away roughly, and he just grabbed my arms instead. "Esme, what's the matter with you?" He asked, and I could see the concern in his eyes. "Why have you been trying to find every excuse not to hang out with me? It's like you've been avoiding me." I gazed at him for a moment, feeling suddenly very emotional. "It's a long story." I muttered. "I've got time. You can tell me." Ethan said gently, and the pain in his eyes was almost enough to make me spill everything right then and there. But I stopped myself. No. "I'm sorry," I said. "I can't tell you. Not now. Maybe not ever. I'm sorry, Ethan." With that, I wriggled from his grasp and ran back inside, slamming the door shut behind me.