Hope.

• Chapter 35 •

• Tyler •

When I walked into school it felt like it was my first day all over again. The hallways seemed to go dead silent before collective whispers broke out. I could feel their gazes on me, and saying that I was confused was an understatement. It made no sense, I was usually just ignored now days, I didn't get why I was the center of attention again.

I tugged at Iris' shirt. "What's going on?" I asked, scrunching my eyebrows together.

"Don't worry about it," she whispered back, suddenly starting to drag me through the hallway causing me to let out a small gasp in surprise.

"What are you doing?" I hissed, trying to pull out of her grip. She didn't say anything as she continued bolting forward with me awkwardly tripping behind her.

"I feel bad for him," I heard someone say. "He's blind and a fag,"

My heard dropped, and I heard the voices quieten down before I heard a door close behind me. I didn't say anything my mind was racing and I didn't know what to do. How did they know? What if Stacy or Lucas knew?

"Tyler, Tyler?" I heard Iris say but it felt distant, I felt my breathing quicken. It was getting warmer and I didn't know what to do, I couldn't stop myself. "Tyler, oh my god, Tyler breathe,"

"I can't," I choked out grasping my collar as I tried to steady myself. It was too hot, something was holding me down. Too much was going through my mind, it was all too much, I couldn't breathe. I knew it was a panic attack but fuck this was bad.

"Tyler, focus on my breathing," Iris said, helping me towards a chair. "Tyler please, breathe with me," I was trying so hard to listen to her voice but it was too much, it was all too much. I felt tears streaming down my face and my body was getting heavier. I didn't know what to do. I wasn't ready for this.

I wasn't fucking ready yet.

"Tyler it's a stupid rumor, it means nothing. Tyler please, just breathe," Iris said, I felt her hands desperately grasping my face. "Come on, focus on my breathing Tyler,"

I tried to copy her but it wasn't working. "It's not fucking stopping," I said, tears now freely falling from my eyes. "Luca, I need to know if he's okay," I blurted, realizing that the same thing could be happening to him.

Iris pulled me into a hug rubbing soothing circles on my back but I couldn't stop shaking. I didn't know what to do. The panic attack had calmed down but I couldn't stop crying. It was all too much. "Luca," I said again.

"Tyler, calm down. We'll look for him later okay?" She said, softly.

"No, Iris you don't understand. His sister can't know," I mumbled, pulling away from her.

"Okay let's find him then yeah?" She asked, trying to help me up and I nodded gasping for air as I tried to stop crying. This was not okay.

We both walked outside, and I felt someone rush up to me, the sound of their shoes clicking loudly on the floor echoing through the hallway. The first bell seemed to have already rang. "Tyler, are you okay, love?" Vicky asked, pulling me into a quick hug. I nodded trying to shoot her a small smile.

I felt someone ruffle my hair to the other side of me and I immediately knew it was Casey. She would always ruffle my hair. "Don't listen to the bullshit going around. They're just making stuff up. They said you were dating that kid Luca." She said, sounding pissed off and I frowned slightly. "Even if you are that's fine but they don't know shit," she added quickly, clearly noticing my change of expression.