The title gives the readers an idea of what your story is about which is good, by the way. But, I think it’s too straightforward. A lot of books have characters that are somehow in undercover, and your book could stand out if its title would be a little more interesting.
Cover: 7/10
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I like that you set the background of the cover as someone who doesn’t show her face. Hence, the hidden identity. The cover could be more eye-catching if you choose other fonts for the title and pseudonym. I’m not saying that your choice of fonts is not pretty, I just want to let you know that you have better choices. I also suggest using DawnEmpress rather than Miss D.E to avoid someone from setting their username as MissDE and stealing your book.
Blurb: 12/15
The blurb kind of intrigued me which is nice. Though, I suggest fixing the capitalizations of some words. Your blurb would actually be a lot better if it was written in paragraph form, not having multiple sentences or phrases that are separated from each other.
Plot: 10/15
Your plot is interesting, but it’s a little typical. I’m sure you have plenty more surprises coming for your readers, but please make sure that it won’t be like any other books' surprises. I recommend you to write something that would give your book its own trademark.
Grammar: 9/15
I like how you know when to use dashes in certain Filipino words (e.g. hinding-hindi) In your prologue, you typed in a word and a sentence in bullet form. I suggest not to use bullet form unless it’s really necessary. I also noticed that some sentences lack proper punctuation marks. When writing a book, don’t use informal spellings. For example, instead of writing nung, you write noong. There’s a quote in your book that says: Don’t be decieve and don’t trust anyone. It’s actually deceived. Proper use of capitalizations and possessives would make your book better. Your writing style is too direct, so I suggest you give your readers more details about the story.
Characters: 7/10
I love that the main character was once weak but later then turned into this fierce and powerful girl. I didn’t give you a perfect score because I wasn’t able to really connect with this character. In order to be a good writer, your readers must feel connected with your characters. But don’t worry, first drafts are often filled with mistakes.
Dialogue: 7/10
The dialogues seem realistic which is really really great. But, the dialogues lack punctions and some words' first letters are capitalized even if they're not supposed to be. But again, do not worry, because this is something you can fix in the near future.
Enjoyment: 6.5/10
I did get excited because of how the blurb intrigued me, but as I read more and more, I started losing my interest. Here's a tip so your readers would stay: use cliffhangers.
And a bonus (no points): OVERALL COMMENT
Overall, your book may have a chance to get more reads if you really pay attention to your grammar. As I said before, first drafts are often filled with mistakes, but at least try to avoid those mistakes. If you're having trouble with your grammar, the number one thing to do is seek help. You can also try downloading Grammarly to help you with your grammar. But anyway, good luck and best wishes for your book!
