Chapter One

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[welcome, this fic is a joke but has cute moments so please stick with it! thank you for reading x]

It's a normal Saturday morning. The birds outside cried in despair as I tried to unblock the toilet. No luck. I look up and stare sadly at the mirror, my bright green orbs glistening with tears. Why is my life such a mess?

'Hannah, if you're late to work one more time I'm selling you for cigs!' my abusive mum screeches from downstairs. Her words were slurred and indistinguishable. Did I tell you she's an alcholic? She's been drinking all night. Typical. You see, it's just us two now, it's hard to talk about what happened to my Dad and the others. I know my mother loves me really though, I cherish 'The Amazing Book is Not of Fire' she got me for my 13th birthday.

I quickly put on my rubber ducky earrings and perfectly slathered on some thick eyeliner - I don't want people thinking I'm on the straight side of TikTok.

'Hurry up useless!' my Mum screamed yet again.

I throw on my favourite green plaid shirt, put my hair into a messy bun and skate out the door as quickly as I can, hoping my Mum wouldn't catch me and beat me. Finally, I'm free. I felt the October breeze hit my face as I glided effortlessly along the pavement, it would be the perfect month to fall in love. The falling leaves, hoodies, the hot chocolates and beanies. If only I could fall in love again, it's so hard after my messy, public break up with Jojo.

Again, I find it hard to talk about.

I arrived to my workplace, almost collapsing in exhaustion due to the 20 mile journey. 'I see you've finally arrived you worthless girl.' My boss angrily spat and me. He was a tall, menacing oath who smelt like clam chowder. 'You know what to do, get these up by sundown or else you get nothing slag!' He powerfully thrust a gigantic pile of posters into my tiny, delicate arms. I whimpered my acceptance before he stormed off, leaving me all alone like usual. I don't have any friends.

I don't really mind. Normal people scare me.

I look at the first poster and read it out loud.

'Look for the gummy bear album in stores on November 13th...'

I scoff.

'Just a load of trash as usual.' I roll my eyes and look at the next poster in my exceeding large pile.

'SM6, family band going on tour from October...' my voice trails off as my eyes meet with a picture with one particular member of the band.

'Zoo wee mama. She is gorgeous.'

I eagerly scan the page for more details of this beautiful human. There were 5 other siblings in the band, one kind of looked like that dude from the Lorax, but I only had eyes for the older girl.

'Isabel...lead vocals and bassist.' I stare adoringly at her photo for a minute or maybe longer. She was so pretty in that button-up shirt.

My thoughts get interrupted by the angry bellows of my boss from a few yards away. I jump in fear and speed off on my skateboard, already dreading the day's work ahead of me.

To my luck, the long day at work went surprisingly quick with my head filled with thoughts of the dreamy bassist. I was reluctant to part with the last 'SM6' poster but I had no choice. If my mum or my boss found out I was slacking I'd be sold off to One Direction, and unlike other girls, I only listen to really underground indie stuff.

Before I nailed it up against the billboard, I noticed that the band's instagrams were displayed at the bottom, so I eagerly went and followed all of them, but took an extra moment to look over Isabel's.

Wow. A Goddess. Something about that shoulder-length, wavy hair makes me want to run far away with her to a cottage in the middle of the woods.

I noticed she had uploaded something to her story so I opened it. My heart beat accelerated in anticipation as the conent loaded.

'Hey mamas.'

My jaw dropped. Not only was she insanely pretty, but a poetic genius.

'Just filming this to say that SM6 is going on tour! Now here's a challenge, the first person to guess the location of our first location will get a free ticket!'

I didn't need to refer to the poster. Over the day I had practically memorized every miniscule detail on that peice of paper. I stabbed my screen with my strong, musclely fingers, passionately typing out the word 'Chicago'.

I press 'send' and sigh longingly.

There was no way I would ever win. It's worth a try, but nothing ever good has ever happened to me. Even if I do win, why would the beautiful singer fall in love with me? In case you haven't noticed, I'm weird. I'm a weirdo. I don't fit in.

I sigh again and hop on my skateboard, starting my 20-mile trip back to the hell-hole I call home.

As I solemnly crossed the busy highway, my phone buzzed. My stomach drops. Have I won?! I stop in my tracks. My eyes widen as I check my instagram DMs, ignoring the massive pile-up I created on the road.

This could be life-changing. I click on the notifaction practically wetting myself with excitement.

It was not Isabel.

Nor was it any other of the horse-loving band members.

It was Jojo.

I read the message, adrenaline running through every inch of my body.

'🤩💖🧚‍♀️Look where you're going when you cross the road 🧚‍♀️💖💫 oopsies too late 😍💕💅'

Oh dear God no.

I look up and see Jojo at the wheel of her bullet-proof, spike-encrusted JoJoMobile, her icy silver bow glistening evilly in the moonlight. Her ferocious accomplice, the yorkshire terrier BowBow, snarled aggressively at me, bearing it's sharp white teeth, and hungry for human flesh. She smiled a horrendous smile and said,

'If you mess with me and the Siwanatorz, I say see you laterz!'

I screamed and ran for cover behind one of the burning cars I caused to crash earlier. But it was too late.

While cackling and simultaneously singing her hit pop song 'Boomerang', she propelled the JoJoMobile into me at 200km/h. The pain was unimaginable. I could hear my bones shattering even over the deafening, music.

That isn't the worst thing.

I kick Bowbow out the way as he tries to eat my lung and I rummage through my own blood and organs. There I find my phone, crushed to pieces.

I scream again.

'How will I ever know if I won the competition?!' I cry, sinking to the ground as I black out from severe blood loss.

Before I succumb to my death I hear Jojo, faintly calling out 'I'll be back!'.

Great. Just what I need. I have discovered the love of my life but my crazy ex keeps getting in the way.

I hate my life. 







[i promise you it gets better]



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