Confessions of a Teenage Alcoholic

Chapter 38

"Ives?" Jackson's voice was soft.

I was sat up against his pillows, playing with his hair as his back was pressed against my front, leaning on me, between my legs.

I don't know how we ended up like that. But I definitely wasn't complaining.

We had hardly talked.

Neither of us wanting to talk about it, or disrupt the little spell we were in.

"Yeah?"

"My mum will be back soon. The kids."

I can't help the smile at his pained voice. "Are you kicking me out?"

"No."

My voice falls quiet at his dominating stance and I press on his forehead so his head falls back, my face hovering over him.

"You're not kicking me out?"

He shakes his head up at me and I feel almost faint when he tilts his lips and gives me a brief reassuring kiss. "I'm just merely suggesting we shower and get dressed."

"I have no clothes." I whisper and look to the pile of clothes on the floor, the rain ridden clothes most definitely are not being put on.

"You can just wear mine. Come on." He moves away from me and I suddenly feel so exposed. Sat on his bed utterly bare, open for him to take me in with his eyes.

And that's what he did when he climbed of the bed and turns to look at me. It was now maybe eleven in the morning.

I was exhausted, a lot had happened this morning.

I wouldn't even normally be awake yet. Not on a Saturday.

I watch as Jackson's eyes drink me in, and I pull my legs up insecurely as his eyes trail every inch of me.

"Why are you covering up?" He asks and I guess it does seem silly, especially since he's moving around his room unclothed and utterly unbothered.

"I dunno. Instinct?"

"Well stop." He leans down and pulls my ankle, making my legs fall away from covering me and he sends me a boyish smile.

It was strange. The dynamic. It felt flirty. Young. Almost easy.

"Are you coming then?" Jackson asks and I just nod, letting my legs carry me to him and he pulls us, clumsily into the bathroom.

"Where are your family?" I ask as he turns on the shower on and lets me get in first.

"They went to a boot fair or something, I wouldn't know. I just knew they were out."

I send him an embarrassed smile and my head falls back when the warm water hits me. We stand together under the stream of water and he moves me so I was pressed up against him, so that the water could run over us both equally.

"I've never showered with someone before." He says and my heart expands because I forget he's not really an intimate person.

I reach for the shampoo and I reach my arms up to squeeze a little on his head. Because boys need to be touched gently too, they need to feel cared about.

I started to run my fingers through his hair, lathering it over his scalp and massaging his head. His eyes fell shut and I continued to watch him, I was careful not to get any in his eyes and before I rinsed it his lips were on my own before I could even realise he had lowered his head.

I smiled into his lips and then I broke the kiss to look up at him.

He was looking at me with so much emotion I decided it was too dangerous to keep looking.