He can change~ Monty&Winston- 13 reasons why fanfic

Chapter 2: Realization

A/N: Hey guys welcome back! I apoglize I've been absent for almost a week I'd just completely forgot to write another chapter but since 13 reasons why season 4 comes out like tomorrow I figured I'd write another chapter for y'all

Also Winston is aware of what Monty did to Tyler in this fanfic I forgot to mention but this chapter is what happens to Monty on his first couple days while he meets a new prisoner meanwhile Winston helps clear Monty's name

I'm really glad you guys like it so far. I'll try my best update as much as I can just let me know what you like and your opinion on my chapters. It would mean so much to me but as I further ado let's get on with the chapter

Monty's POV; The next few days here was agonizing, part of me felt as if this wasn't fair, that it was Tyler's fault that I wasn't out living my own life.. but I came to the realization what life? I was a guy who put on a fake mask every single day living a lie.. that I was just a straight popular  jock who loves to terrorize people for my own amusement.. but in reality I was gay, I didn't like hiding behind my own team for my own reputation, I was abused my whole life from my dad, and my own mother abandon me and left him to take care of her own son.. And she didn't manage to realize her own mistake, I have no friends, the friends I had left; Bryce- when he heard that I raped Tyler he planned to tell the cops everything, and fucking Charlie just left right after that.. And hell even my whole team hates me..

To be honest there was nothing keeping in existence well maybe there was one thing, Winston. He let me confine in him when he could've easily ignored me, tell me off, throw me away like the garbage I was designated to be.. but no he didn't, he accepted me despite beating the crap out of him at that party.. He still show some kindness that I didn't earn and part of me feels gulity yet grateful for that.. but I didn't deserve it.. what I deserved to feel was regret, hopeless and guilty for raping Tyler..

I didn't exactly realize that I could even feel that remorse.. that I would feel that same guilt for that little shit but for some fucking reason I did, was it the fact that I was in jail and that I would face the consequences? Perhaps that was partially it.. but something else was making me feel this shit.. was it.. no it couldn't be.. Could've it been Winston..?

I mean it couldn't be as awful I think it could be, he helped take care of me for two nights, he was there when no one else would give a shit about me, he offered me the thing I wouldn't have been able to give back to anyone.. And that was kindness.. however as much as I wanted to have that happiness.. to be able to be myself who I wanted to be.. for someone who I really liked.. but it was too late and once he finds out what I did, I just know he would be better off without me bringing that fourth of pain.

It would be best after all even if tore my insides out, in fact it was but I couldn't exactly do anything about that. I would just have to live with it as best as I can.

'Living with it has actually become harder.' You could've expected me to move on from what would hang over me for the rest of my life because I was told to move on from it, it happened just forget about it and for most of the months I could easily do it, day by day I lived with it but when I was able to have the feeling to apoglize, to make things better that suddenly changed, but I wasn't Bryce I didn't have that chance to be better.. I didn't just get to make things right with people that I caused huge pain to..