lost | the hunger games

• xii •

❝you keep us alive, and i'll keep you on two feet.❞

bellamy blake, the 100

☾

Morning of the Quarter Quell, I threw up, and then proceeded to take a shower. That's my last clear thought from that morning. The moment I stepped out of the shower and wrapped myself in a towel, my body turned on autopilot. Everything up until the Launch Room contained a certain haze to it.

Last time, my arms shook with miniature earthquakes as Ines led me to the roof. I am certain that if the electrical current hadn't shocked me into place on the ladder, I would've fallen to my death immediately. This time, I was calm. I didn't even so much as shiver as I was accompanied by Rhys and Ines to the roof. I kissed Rhys goodbye, later noting the pooling tears in his eyes, and let myself and Ines be lifted into the hovercraft.

I remember the sting of the tracker being injected into my arm, the thing faintly glowing before I could no longer see it. Ines insisted on food, though I didn't really object. I don't remember what I ate. I recall drinking water, though. I knew the repercussions of dehydration.

"The fabric's light, breathable, this time."

I blinked. For the past ten minutes, Ines had been helping into my uniform, silently, in the Launch Room. This was the first Ines had spoken since she'd told me to order food on the way to the arena. I checked the bluish-gray material of the jumpsuit. She was right. The nylon shoes we were given were waterproof as well.

"Do you think it'll be salt or fresh water?" I inferred politely.

She shrugged. I realized she wore barely any make up today, and her outfit was dark and plain. As if she were attending my funeral today. "No idea. But if it is a water based arena, I have no doubt you'll come out of this alive."

"Thanks, Ness."

Ines winked at me. She tucked my gold necklace into my jumpsuit. There was no mention of it or the replacement of my old one. "Don't want that flying everywhere."

I didn't laugh.

"Well," Ines cleared her throat and straightened her posture. "Before you enter the arena, I think you should know something."

My forehead wrinkled in confusion. "What?"

Her eyes filled with pity, an emotion I'd never seen her wear on her face before. It unnerved me. "There's no easy way to tell you this, but your escort, Cynara Linen, was a spy. She was conspiring against President Snow and the Capitol."

"What? How do you know?" I asked, feigning surprise. It wasn't that hard, considering I knew how careful Cynara was. How could she have gotten caught so easily.

"I caught her talking about rebels and taking Annie and Mags somewhere. But don't worry, she's been arrested, and Annie and Mags are perfectly safe."

Panic filled my chest, however my expression remained the same.

"I hope she gets what she deserves."

"I never liked her either," my stylist agreed. I could see different expressions shifting in her eyes. I saw pride and suspicion, but most shockingly of all, she looked . . . smug.

My chest caved in on itself. Ines was one of my most trusted friends. She was there for me through my games and everything else going forward as a Victor. And there she stood, proud for sentencing Cynara to death or worse, and for defending Panem's dictator. I actually thought Ines believed in something better than the Hunger Games and the Capitol.