i promise

you chose her.

I stared at the ceiling, tears falling down my eyes. It happened when I thought of him, my brother best friend before he died. I had met him first and we- no I fell in love with him, and well, i guess he liked me because I was so different from other girls.

Tying my ash brown hair in a ponytail I walked into the girly store, feeling brave. Maybe today, I could i get a dress and not feel like a fucking cow in it.

"Not bad, but you looked better in black it suits you..." I heard a smooth, deep voice say as I check out a pale pink dress that hugged my figure and made me look more like a girl. I gasped, turning around. I came face to face with to big dark seemly never ending dark brown eyes, framed with curly black hair. 

"Thanks" I said softly, running to the changing room, shrugging out of the dress, I decided to still buy it, I picked it up and smiled. My face was probably the same shade of pink as it. Running out. I crashed face first into something hard and I prayed it wasn’t a mannequin.

"Well don't go falling for me now?" He whispered, laughing at his own joke and I wished I would have listened to him.

"I won’t..." I trailed off, walking away from him.

"I uh, forgot your name" 

"Um, well I never gave it to you?" I said but it came out like more of a question.

"Well I’m Louis.”

“Cassandra”

“That’s a beautiful name, it has to have beautiful meaning”

“It means she who is ignored.”

“Well I won’t ignore you.” He said, shoving a piece a paper into my hand and walking away.

And it was his number, the number I waited to dial for least three weeks. And for a while I actually believed he could love me and that we could be together for a long time. I close my eyes and turned to my side and fell asleep.

The next morning, I woke up and put my hair in a high ponytail, grabbed some skinny jeans and a black shirt, walked into to the showers. Humming 'just a friend' by jasmine v.

I ran to where we usual met up at Saturday morning, I didn't bother telling him that I was going to be there. I mean we always showed up,  fighting or not.

"And you have to believe me, you're different..." I heard his voice clearly. Swallowing my pride,I turned the corner. Coming face to face with my biggest fear. There he was perfect curls, big dark brown eyes staring down at this shorter girl with blonde hair and green eyes with matching green highlights. Marching over to him. I called out.

"Who the hell, what?" I couldnt even make out the damn sentence.

"Who is she?" The girl uttered, confusion and anger swiring in her eyes.

"She's just a friend. I swear."

"Just.a.friend." I repeated, turning around and walking away.

Getting out the shower, I threw the shirt and skinny jeans and laughed. I walked downstairs and saw my dad dressed for work.

"Hey hunny, ready for group."

"Yes!"

"Could have been spending the summer   before college going out with your boyfriend but no, you're going to group..." My mother chimed in, putting a plate in front of my dad and signaling me to sit at the table.

"Actually we br-"

"Hey, good morning. I'm here to take Cassie to group." His vioce cut like a knife as took my seat next to my father, I kept my eyes on the table as tears pricked my eyes.

"Hey, louis." My mother cheerful called as my dad mumbled good morning, she set a plate in front of me. "What ever saying hun?"

"I said actually we are fine." I muttered picking at my food, I slowly ate it as I heard him converse with my mother and father as if nothing happened.

'That fucking bastard" I thought to myself,as we got to into his black BMW.

"Look, I know I was your first love but killing yourself over me and your brother is not the way to solve things."

"What the fuck?" Was the only thing, I could utter as we get settled in the car. 

"Cassie I know why-"

"Cassandra"

"What?"

"My name is Cassandra.bitch" I said, I put my ear buds and started blasting my music.