His Chosen One

Seven

"You are so sweet... My sweet darling... No need to cry... I'm not in any hurry to leave..." I cannot resist the temptation to whisper and croon to Ezra as he settles down in my lap once more, belly time* having been explained to me as a treatment that keeps the young men who live here from becoming touch starved while simultaneously increasing blood flow to their delicate wombs and causing a great deal of relaxation, the two-part device slightly intimidating when I had been led into the room full of loungers and a few sleeping innocents partaking in the strange-looking device... At first, I had thought that they were strapped into the loungers themselves... But then, the carers who had led us back in order to keep an eye on the two of us had lifted the one that my Lovely would be using off of the reclined seat revealing it to be comprised of a mat meant to lain upon, with two straps that connect to a shorter, circular mat that is meant to be secured snuggly against their bellies. It had been explained that the design is meant to mimic the feel of being held, the pad meant to be laid on one that radiates a gentle heat, the one that lays on the stomach one that pulses and massages.

I do not think any of us had originally planned for me to stay this long... But removing Ezra from my lap had proved extremely difficult, a surprising bout of tears making an appearance when one of the carers mentioned me taking my leave... The conversation to follow had been a very serious one with the blonde woman... The one who had introduced herself as Wendy... and Ms.Ezalie herself called out of the office at the sound of sobbing... Sadly it seems the lovely young man in my arms has always been quick to attach himself, crying even when his favorite staff members head home at the end of their shift, loneliness something that I imagine plagues most of the young men who are surrendered to homes like these... I had made it more than clear that I am willing and absolutely able to stay here and coddle my sweet Ezra as long as they allow me to, nothing in my life seeming more important than spending time with him at the moment... And time well spent it is indeed though it is currently set to the tone of weak sniffles making their way up to my ears as Wendy turns the soothing device on exposing us both to the benefits of the larger mat with the way Ezra has chosen to arrange us in the lounger.

I could have never imagined that the way I had chosen to go about getting him to be a bit less nervous with me today would end in him latching on to me so quickly... But I am surely glad that it did as he returns each one of my whispers with tiny grunts of acknowledgment that let me know that he is listening, and that he hears what I am telling him... That I don't ever want to walk away from this stunning Angel... I just want him to feel happy and safe, and if that is achieved by cradling him in my arms there will absolutely never be a complaint on my end...

...

Ezra

...

"You just want to be held and loved on... I can do that, yes I can, Love... Such a darling you are..." I know that I should have been able to keep ahold of myself over the simple act of Nicklaus possibly leaving for the day... But as soon as Wendy had coaxed me from his lap I had suddenly felt adrift and the tears that are normally reserved for expressing my sadness when Wendy herself has to leave for the day had suddenly made an appearance...

I cannot figure out why... But as Nicklaus himself steadies me I know his words ring true... I do want to be held... And no one ever has the time... And yet here he is giving up his entire afternoon so that he might stay simply so that he might wrap his arms around me in the softest of holds, one of his hands cupping my cheek so that he might stroke just beneath my eye with his thumb.

Wendy has done this on a few occasions, staying with me after her shift is over if only to keep me from shuttering myself away in my room to cry over her leaving... until Ms.Ezalie told her she had to stop showing me favoritism despite the distress that her absence causes...

Other than that...

No one had ever bothered...

My parents as well as everyone else's had been informed that it was best to avoid touching us because it would make it harder for them to walk away and leave us here... There had been many cases in the beginning of the home-away-from-home system of parents still developing a bond with their children, and trying to retrieve them, sometimes forcefully, from the facilities they had surrendered their young ones too... To prevent that the age of surrender got earlier and earlier... And touching was more and more frowned upon, no matter how lonely and unwanted it leaves us feeling.

I've not had to say a single word since his arrival, and already I can understand why those rules are put in place...
Something as simple as letting Nicklaus rub my back had somehow morphed into me not wanting him to walk away from here today without me... I don't want him to leave me here and I barely know him... He barely knows me!

I'm not sure how exactly he has managed to infiltrate the walls I have tried so hard to build up within myself to try and keep the ache inside of me from getting any worse than it already is... I know that allowing my defenses to drop is more than a bad idea because I know the hurt I had felt at the thought of him going home for the day while I am forced to stay here will only hurt even more the longer I allow myself to melt into his kind words and careful hold...

I have known for a very long time that it is possible for predator types to be gentle... Almost all of the staff kept on hand here Predatory, and almost all of them careful of us while administering as much affection as they are allowed too to promote a sense of wellbeing for us while we are forced to stay here waiting on a husband or family with the means to protect us comes along... According to rumor, most of them are only gentle due to sterilization taking away a significant portion of their aggression, even the security team, though I cannot attest to how true that is, Wendy's account of how she felt both before and after the procedure that prevents any misconduct or unplanned pregnancies nearly identical, though we are not sure that the others would be able to claim the same...

But maybe those rumors are wrong... They must be... Because there has not been a single act of aggression from Nicklaus so far... Just the softest of phrases and promises that have no business making me feel nearly as special as I do at the moment...

*tummy time has been changed to belly time