Tell me about Jack Keagan

Chapter 1

Jack Keagan sat herself down on the green park bench, observing the people who walked past her. She saw the regulars; the blonde girl with the husky dog and Nike-only clothing, the elderly couple who always stopped by the oak tree to sit and, her personal favourite, the biker-looking dude with his sausage dog who visited every Tuesday. The familiarity of the scene presented a homeliness Jack lacked. So many things happened as expected, the uniformity of her visits never ceased to provide security. She could pretend, just for a moment, that she was an unexceptional woman, another face amongst the graffiti and streetlights of New York. Of course, it was only pretending, and the moment spanned around 30 minutes.

She enjoyed this part of her day; The emptiness of time between arriving on the subway and starting her afternoon shift at Big Wang's Sports Bar on Doyers Street in Downtown NY. Half an hour of peace before the smell of beer, Wang Wings (how delightful) and stale menthol cigarettes seeped their way into her clothing. Not forgetting the cacophony of cheers, slurps and sexual harassment of female staff. As much as she loathed working there at times, she knew her options. No one else was going to give a job to someone with no birth certificate or a social security number. She also knew the pain of introducing herself to potential employers and colleagues, being reminded that she indeed was 'a girl called Jack' in this century. As much as she disliked, even hated, her job at times, she was thankful that someone was willing to take her, and the work itself wasn't incredulously laborious. Jack did find the constant requirement to greet new customers like old friends exhausting, but she could live through it.

The way the sun seeped through the leaves above her was mesmerising, distracting her for a moment. The glowing greens and fading yellows made a constellation above, moving from spring to summer seemingly before her. Jack loved being enveloped in the world, just taking everything in as it happened around her. The sounds were the biggest distraction. The rustling of bushes, the taxi drivers blaring their horns, the varying accents and drumbeat of feet in all directions all the time provided a lullaby to her ruminating brain. It was the opposite to what she had known for the first years of her adult life, and not by choice, mind you. Jack became transfixed watching a man and his toddler, stopping nearby so the child could pet a giant golden retriever she easily could have ridden like a horse. The small hesitant hand making a gentle smack on the dog's head before being guided to instead use long strokes encapsulated her attention. Jack liked watching people with kids, but always avoided it when any of her roommate's friends offered her a hold of their babies or asked her to babysit. She didn't have anything against children. They were, as she saw them, just little fools who didn't know any better. She just didn't know how to deal with them.

It was never that something was serenely beautiful, but that she had been disconnected from everyone for so long that Jack saw most things as if for the first time. Small things like the kid and the dog always caught her attention. Things that were gentle and insignificant. On the flip side, it almost always got overwhelming. When you know you have a place in the world but can never seem to find it, it becomes exhausting. She decided to look away, distract herself with something else. Sometimes looking at things you can't have does more damage than good.

She glanced down at her watch, the rose-gold hands telling her it was time to go, slipping her satchel over her shoulder, and pulling her dented iPod Classic from its' pocket at the side of the bag. Jack's roommate, Larissa, had bought it for her on eBay and showed her how to use it. Simple enough that she got the hang of it quickly, and with all of Larissa's music on it, it became a constant companion in the battle against world overwhelm. Larissa's music taste consisted mainly of 80s rock bands and pop hits, which suited her quite well. Of course, it had been on eBay because it was old and outdated, but Jack liked it even more because of that. Larissa teased her for liking something so outmoded, but Jack argued the functionality rather than reveal her true reasons why. There was only so much change a person could handle. It helped make transition times manageable. With one last backwards glance at the sublime scene, Jack made her way to work, unknowingly leaving her favourite place for the last time.