Explore the mystical forest of a small witch that keeps the writing world safe with her reviews that will help you improve as a writer.
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"What better way for him to overcome a hurt than to be surrounded by someone of love?" - Cupidslittlewings
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⍋Primium impressionem (18.5/20): This cover is proof that simplicity rules if it's done correctly! I adore it, it feels like I'm delving into an icy kingdom ruled by none other than my beautiful Jin - the colours, the title, the font... It's perfect! What I'm a tiny bit sad about is that only a quote is there to lead me into this short scenario. Although beautiful and so damn aesthetic, it doesn't tell me almost anything about what I might expect when I dive in to read it.
The advantage that scenarios have over novellas is that people are more likely to check the scenarios nonetheless since they are short, so having a quote only isn't that big of a deal, but I'd still recommend you add a little bit of something-something just to tickle my mind. And the minds of many others as well!
⍋Et compages grammatica damnationem (17.5/20): Your grammar is nigh perfect, but these subtle mistakes still manage to slip here and there and wobble the foundations of your work. Let me elaborate a bit:
The singing embers was beginning to create a soothing aura around Seokjin... The slip here is that you associated the verb was with singing instead of embers. Embers are the noun carrying the action, singing is an adjective that describes your noun and can't carry the action in this situation. I also notice that you write in the past tense, but there are occasions you tend to use the present tense which makes your writing not sound as natural as it could. His eyebrows began to furrow deeper as his thoughts travel around his mind... is one of a couple I managed to find. Also, when you say a person jumps off of something, it means they are using the object as leverage to leap into the water, out of a plane or similar actions. What I think you were intending to say is he jumped out of the armchair.
These details are the ones that bind your writing and create a beautiful structure, so please don't overlook them (I noticed this in your other works as well). Comb through your sentences with laser focus, play detective and remedy your foundations to create a story so damn wonderful no soul would manage to put down until they read all you have to offer!
⍋Scripto artes (20/20): Simply - I fucking love it. There's this saying that goes something like this: The true greatness of the artist stems from their possibility to make something incredibly hard seem like a walk in the park. You managed to achieve it because I have a feeling that so much work has gone into every sentence, yet as I read them, I have this sense of easiness that envelops me like a blanket and makes my heart warm.
Beautiful, absolutely beautiful and I envy you so much for it! I'm striving to be like you!
⍋Influunt (10/10): You've mastered the art of proper flow, whether you're writing a one-shot, a novella or anything you set your mind to. It's so perfect that I have no words, well freaking done, Cupid!
⍋Insidias (20/20): Once again, you've baffled me with your writing skills and amazing talent you possess. It's so wonderful to delve into your mind and see how effortlessly it seems for you to come up with such a complex plot! And to be able to tell everything you need to in less than two chapters shows how talented you really are. I have no words!
⍋Characteribus (20/20): I need more characters like this - filled with secrets yet telling me just enough to let my thoughts flow and try to solve the mystery behind their actions. PURE PERFECTION, I can only praise you to the Pluto and back! Seriously, I can't do anything but commend you for your hard work! The world needs to see your talent, Cupid!
⍋Totalis puncta et summaries: 106/110! You have such quality in your work and I'll recommend your stories to anyone and everyone. The way you write is beautiful and I know that I'm talking to a future star, I'll just patiently wait for it to happen. Congratulations, Cupid! You're damn amazing and I hope you achieve your dreams, I'm here to support you and love you!
