I rather choose for myself | Seungcheol x Reader

1

Soulmate mark: The ability with just a flicker of glimpsing through the significant other's thoughts, feelings, and taste.

You never really understood the term "soulmate".

It led to the impression that a person could live happily ever after in meeting their other half.

Maybe it was the pessimistic side in you talking, but the impressions of storytelling and actually living through it yourself is completely different.

Your parents met quickly just as they were in high school, both their timers went off. And instinctively hit it off well from so-called destiny.

Maybe it's probably you're a bitter person.

'Ha- yeah, it could be..,' you couldn't help but scoff the thought to yourself. Nowadays, the significance of soulmates and soul marks seems to never change but it didn't feel like any relevance for you. 

Each person had their own unique soul mark. A timer at their wrists, a tattoo, a quote of their first words, traits about them marking their body, and not being able to see color. The list goes on...

You didn't want to believe in destiny.

You want to believe in yourself, pick on your own choices on your own terms.

It didn't have to be like this for everyone.

At the beginning of every child's 4th birthday, they received their soul mark.

It was well talked about amongst everyone.

Soul marks

Ever since you began school, everyone chatted about their soul marks. It seemed fun at first but it grew annoying for you. Girls would try to show off their soul marks as if a contest. But you, you hadn't shown any signs of a physical indication of a soulmate's mark. Your parents persuaded you that everyone has their own and different soul mark for their soulmate.

"Once you look into their eyes you'll know for sure it's them."

As you grew older, you grew to avoid the topic whenever it was brought up. Whether it was physical there or not. The possibility to meet your own soulmate frightened you. Why should be it a factor in your own love life?!

You wanted to experience it on your own terms.

You were finally graduating high school with your partner by your side. They had their own soul mark but you both denied destiny's choice.

Ha- in your face destiny!

You've been together for almost two years. It felt instant when you had first started talking with each other, you felt compatible with each other. You couldn't deny yourself, but you were really content with it; you felt you had control in choosing your own romantic partner.

Although you both might be admitting into two different universities, we made it a promise to ourselves that the long-distance wouldn't break you two apart to something petty as that for a meaningless breakup.

You were already entering college with initial goals in mind. Heading to classes and working.

What a joy.

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"Finally I can take a shower," just as you walked out towards your car. It had been a long day from your part-time job. It had been around 8, and you were in charge to close up shop for the night.

You closed the shutters and padlocked the door on your way out. As you adjusted yourself in the car, you made your way to your small apartment. It was quite humid, especially during the summertime in California. You felt thankful that you hadn't run into traffic on the way home. As you parked the car into a side street, you gathered your items -your keys on hand and your bag strapped on your shoulder. You made way towards the apartment.

"What a day," sighing in relief. It really had been a day. The cafe had been busy and you had recently felt unproductive during your summer. You plan to settle yourself, placing your stuff down at a counter. And directing yourself straight for a shower playing SEVENTEEN music in the background.

As you hummed and sang along to each song played, you felt relaxed. You quickly dressed in your pjs.

You wanted to relax, but you really hadn't eaten anything recently when you had gotten off work. "I should probably eat something," as you hummed in agreement. You were making way towards the kitchen, hopefully, there's food.

But from the tip of your tongue, you just salivated for something.

"Damn, I'm having a craving! Maybe I should order Korean or make something," contemplating your choices. Did you have a bit of money to take out, ahh-yeah not really. Your bank account statement says otherwise due to school.

'Yeah- no, the fridge it is!'

You skimmed over the fridge and your cabinet, you could say you had enough for something to be considered a good meal.

"Welp its too damn hot, my best bet kimbap night!" Just as you prepped the ingredients out. You walked over and gather the items from your pantry.

"Okay, I got some rice from the fridge which should be fine. I have some packaged seaweed, which is alright for now. Then it just leaves the egg, veggies, and meat to cook."

You pulled out a cutting board and prep in washing the carrots and cucumber. With the knife in hand, you began to brisk through it and complete the kimbap.

'Man I'm so hungry' as a faint voice chimed. You had been prepping your meal and didn't realize the presence of your soulmate in your head.

You hummed back in response.

You knew that the idea of meeting your soulmate terrified you, but it felt no harm to just listen in and respond back.

As you grew older you understood your own soul mark. You would faintly hear their own thoughts, feelings and have their tastes. It wasn't as if you could control it, but it just generally flowed in and out. You just adjusted through it.

Your soulmate spoke differently when you first heard him for the first time. You weren't able to understand him during primary school. But gradually came to realize he was from a different country and was Korean. From listening to his thoughts, it felt you were at his subconscious at times.

It felt beautiful hearing his thoughts. And you just wanted to understand him just for your own sanity. It wasn't as if you weren't uninterested to try to understand what he was saying in your head. So you planned to self-teach yourself. It was a challenge. You felt proud of yourself when you first understood heard his thoughts.

'I want to hug this dog, they're so cute'

You were able to hear him contemplating the idea, but you could only just chuckle at his predicament.

'How soft you are' you thought in your head.

During the years you had become conscious of the soul mark's ability. You were able to drift in and out hearing his innermost thoughts and connected to his feelings. You couldn't help but feel ashamed by invading his life without meaning too. This soul mark, you honestly hated it. You didn't know the extent, that it could be applied the same to him.

You never wanted to have someone going into your head, not like this. It became an effort to mask your thoughts. You didn't think too much or dwelled onto anything, you just plan to hide your feelings as much as possible. But to be honest you were so glad that your connections were irregular. 

It was rare occasions like these that you were able to "talk" with your soulmate.

He seemed as though a genuine type of guy. From hearing about him, you assumed he had a lot on his plate. Always thinking about his brothers, in how he should be responsible and strict with himself. He seems like a type of caring guy, timid at times, but somewhat determined to give his all.

You didn't pry too much to know more about him and you wanted to keep a sense of privacy for yourselves. It's been 20 years of your life, and it hasn't been like you plan on looking for the guy if he isn't either.

You began eating your meal and plan to head in for bed, grabbing your phone you sent out a quick good night to your partner.