chapter nineteen | sadie

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"Moments with you, that's when I wish I could stop time."

beautiful storms | chapter nineteen

Sadie quietly eats her pizza, only taking small bites. It was a quiet Saturday morning after the aftermath of the day before. They were having pizza from the night before. Sadie peeks a glance at Jude who stares blankly down at his pizza. She turned to her grandmother, she was reading adoption papers and she played no mind to the tension growing in the room. The emptiness of the room. Jude catches Sadie staring at him and his features don't change as he looks away. Sadie sighs, getting up from the table.

"You barely touched the pizza, you either Jude. Eat both of you."

Sadie sits back down and picks her pizza up, taking larger bites this time. Silence fills the room again and she lets her mind wander.

"Why are you guys so quiet?" Sadie closes her eyes and she could feel herself getting a headache.

"I'm not really hungry, um, I think-- nevermind." Jude gets up from the table and he walks out of the kitchen and their grandmother sighs before looking back down at the adoption papers. Sadie jumps when she hears him slam his door shut.

"It'll be fine, he's just angry." Sadie ignores her and finishes her pizza.

Jude stares out his window, looking up at the moon as he tries to calm himself. He brings his legs to his chest and he lays his head on his knees. Why me? Why couldn't I just be normal? -- His phone vibrates next to him and he sees a text from Cara.

Are you okay?

Is Sadie okay?

Do you want me to call?

Nevermind, I'll just come over. Give me ten minutes.

Jude smiles as he texts her back and he sits his phone back down and returns to stare at the moon. Maybe if he can't make himself feel better maybe she can. He didn't want to let her light go. He didn't want to let her go not for one second of his fucked up life.

Could he be happy?

Could Sadie be happy?

Months have gone by since he actually met Cara and she brought light into his already dim life. She replaced the light with his mother's light that became so dim. So dull without her. He turns his head when he hears someone by his door and they stand there for a few seconds before walking away. Jude sighs, knowing it's Sadie. She returns to her room and he falls back on his bed and he stares up at the ceiling. He lays his hand on his chest.

There's a knock on his door. He sits up and he sees Cara. She smiles before flopping on his bed and she lands right next to him. Her hand gently hits him in the face and he chuckles as he watches her sit up. "Hey." Jude smiles, kissing her forehead.

Cara leans her forehead against his and she closes her eyes. "Hi," Jude smirks and he picks her up, laying her on top of him. She quickly wraps her arms around his neck, hugging him. He adjusts himself so his back is against the headboard. He caresses her cheek and she leans into his touch then he pokes her nose. She scrunches her nose up and slaps his hand away.

"Do you want to go to the lake today?" Cara says softly.

"I'm not really feeling the lake today."

Jude hugs her waist, hugging her back. He places his head in the crook of her neck. "How do you feel after yesterday?" Jude pulls away and he sighs.

"I don't understand why I didn't notice any of it. I feel so guilty for not being home more. I should've stayed home.

"

Jude turns his head and he sees Albert as he flies to the tree by his window. Jude smiles at the bird and he turns back to look at Cara.

She frowns. "It breaks my heart that Sadie had to go through that." He lifts up his hand to her hair and plays with a curl, twisting it in between his fingers.

"Hayes is my father." Jude blurts out.

Cara stares at Jude without blinking and she gulps, not saying a word. She was having trouble processing what he had just told her. Jude taps her jaw, wanting her to close her mouth. "Jude." She brings him closer to her and hugs him tightly. "I'm so sorry." Her voice cracks, sending chills through Jude's body and he hugs her back. He lays his head on her shoulder.

She moves off of him and she moves to sit next to him. She lays her head on his shoulder.

"Please don't go. I don't want to be alone." He says as he grabs her hand.

"Then I won't go." She whispers. She intertwined their fingers and she kissed them.

Jude glances at a sleeping Cara and pulls her closer to him and he wraps his arms around her waist. She mumbles sleepily, holding on to his hands. He stares out the window again seeing Albert still there and he lets his mind quiet down as he tries to fall back asleep but it just gets louder. She lays her head on his chest and he kisses her forehead.

He decides to not go to sleep and he pushes a curl that falls in her face and he brushes it behind her ear. "I think I'm falling in love with you." He whispers to himself. He watches as she grabs his shirt and he smiles with admiration in his eyes. He adored her. He pulls her closer and lays his chin on the top of her head. He's never really thought of himself as the relationship type but he wouldn't mind it with her. Being with seemed like a dream to him but he desperately wanted to make it a reality. Their reality but something stopped him from asking her and he didn't know what it was.

He will try to figure it out. "Jessica..." He looks down at her as she talks in her sleep. Her small mumbles become louder by the second.

"I didn't mean to, I'm sorry."

Jude's face falls when he realizes that she was dreaming about her father. He doesn't know if he should wake her up or not.

"P-please." Her voice trembles and Jude hears the fear in her voice.

He decides to wake her up. "Cara, wake up. You're having a nightmare." He shakes her lightly and she opens her eyes. She yawns, looking up at Jude and not saying anything she moves her head back to his chest but she doesn't go back to sleep.

"You were having a nightmare about your dad, weren't you?"

She ignores him, "Did you not sleep?" Jude sighs.

"Are you okay?"

"It was just a dream."

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