Waiting | a fanfiction

chapter two

"Is everything alright, Lucas?" Lieutenant Henderson asked as Lucas picked at his dinner.

"No, everything isn't alright." Lucas responded glumly.

"What's on your mind?" Henderson prodded.

"Well, we have a guest, Shelby, and I invited her to eat dinner with us, but I haven't seen her anywhere and it's been ten minutes since dinner started," Lucas looked worried.

"Well, you should go check on her, if it'll make you feel better," Henderson told Lucas after seeing how frightened he was.

"Maybe I will," Lucas decided. He stuffed a forkful of mashed potatoes in his mouth and excused himself from the table.

Lucas rushed out of the cafeteria and through the hallways of Seaquest. He didn't stop until he got to the door of Shelby's quarters. He knocked politely.

"Shelby?" He asked. There was no answer. "Shelby?" He asked again, pounding on the door a bit harder. Still no noise. "Shelby, answer me!!" Lucas cried desperately. After waiting a few more moments he opened the door to an empty room.

Lucas' eyes scanned the room until they landed on another door. The door to the bathroom.

"Shelby? Are you in there?" Lucas placed his ear against the door and could hear shaky breathing on the other side. "Shelby, I know you're in there. Talk to me!!" Tears started to fall out of his eyes. Who knew that a stranger could impact someone in such a way.

"Go away, Lucas," A voice warned from inside the bathroom.

"Shelby, let me in," Lucas breathed.

"I can't, Lucas. Go. Away." Shelby's breaths were hitched, and Lucas could tell she was crying too.

"I'm not leaving you," Lucas told her.

"I can't do this with you here, Lucas. Leave." Her words were urgent and panicked.

"Do what? Shelby, what are you doing in there?!" Lucas started pounding on the door as Shelby sobbed loudly. There was no use holding back now. Lucas swung the bathroom door open to reveal a distraught Shelby staring at herself in the mirror, a knife clutched in her hand.

•••

"Shelby," Lucas looked at me with a sad expression on my face as I stood facing him, sobbing and shaking.

"I'm sorry," I murmured. Lucas walked towards me slowly and took the knife from my hands, placing it on the bathroom counter, before pulling me into a tight hug.

"Don't leave, not yet," He breathed into my hair. My tears fell more silently as I took in his warm embrace. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"Not really," I responded weakly, but Lucas let go and led me to my bed instead. He sat across from me and we looked into each other's eyes before he prompted me to talk.

"Shelby, you can talk to me. Not a single word said here will leave this room." I took a deep breath, ready to trust Lucas. Even though I barely even knew him, he had been so kind to me and I knew I didn't deserve anyone like him. He'd probably get taken from me soon enough anyways.

"Well, I had enlisted in the Navy with my father and brother in order to pay for my mother's hospital bills while my sister stayed home with her," I began. "She had been diagnosed with cancer, and as a poor family we couldn't afford to pay for any of the treatments. So instead we enlisted in the military and sent all our checks to my mother and sister so they could survive. However, after a few short years, my mother passed.

"I had gotten into the army as a 14 year old girl, and only because of my wits, but soon my charisma and bravery led me up through the chain of command. After my mother's passing, I realized that the ocean was where I belonged, so I stayed with the UEO. My brother and father did too, though their motives I don't know.

"We were all stationed on that submarine together, Alpha 29076, before the reactor blew and released half of our oxygen supply with it. I had been out in the ocean collecting samples for a thesis I was working on, when I felt the impulse from the blast. I immediately swam back to the sub, only to find my entire crew dead, including my father, brother, and all my friends.

"They were all gone, everyone and everything that I loved. So why me? Why should I have to suffer and be alone? Why couldn't I have met my demise along with the rest of them? Why did they have to die so I could live?" I wiped the last tears from my eyes as I finished. Surprisingly, sharing my story aloud had helped me feel a bit stronger.

"You're not alone, Shelby, and you never will be again," Lucas said, looking into my eyes. I looked back in his, the soft blue color melting what was left of my heart. He looked down at his lap and took my hands in his.

"I don't want you to leave me, do you understand? That's an order. You're to not take your precious life away from me," Lucas said sternly, looking into my eyes again.

"I don't think a lieutenant should take orders from an ensign," I teased. Lucas smiled and pulled me into a hug. I hugged him back tightly. It felt good to be loved again. For once, I wasn't afraid of what the universe would take away from me. I intended to keep a certain Lucas Wolenczak in my life forever and always.