Still Fucked Up .

Clouded.

Matoria Denise
11:30 pm
Home

I sat there staring at my phone waiting for her response it was from this girl I been talking to on the low she was fem her name was liyah I met her through a app, she was a cute brown skin thick bitch that I would love to fuck but I'm to fucked up over stari to fuck with anybody all the angry and sadness is turning into aggression and I'm starting to become what I was always scared to become this nonchalant bitch that was numb to the world, but what else would I be? I fucked over the love of my life for yours she stood by me and I couldn't get myself together it's like everyday I wake up not wanting to get up I have no motivation to keep going but I keep going, I miss my family I really haven't been talking to kato or mia them lately I miss they ass like crazy but I promised not to come around until I got myself together and that's why I been alone trying to focus on me.

I was knocked out my thoughts as I heard the "ding" from my phone letting me know that somebody was outside of my house and another "ding" from liyah letting me know she was outside, I stood up straightening my clothes out before headed to the door peeking out the front window I see her thick short frame walk up the porch causing me to open the door as she stepped onto the top step, I opened the door wider as she smiled a bright smile pulling me into a hug as I scanned the drive way behind her making sure nobody was watching us, I pulled her further into the house.

"You smell really good" she said smiling at me as she looked down at their floor she was adorable but she had no idea this was gone be her last night alive.

"Thanks shorty u look good" I said returning the smile before walking to the table where there where two glasses and a bottle of Hennessy.

"Thanks I was nervous I didn't wanna overdress" she explained taking a seat on the couch watching me out the dark liquor into each glass.

"Here you go" I said handing her a glass as she kindly took it nodding a quiet thank u as I just watched her she started to shift under my glare making me snap out of it picking up my glass I tooo slow sips as I felt the liquor burn the back of my throat.

"You have nice place, it needs a ladies touch but it's very unique" she spoke taking a look around the living room as I rolled my eyes ladies touch my ass bitch this a hoe pad it will always look like this.

"Yea I decorated it myself I really didn't put that much thought into it" I said taking another sip of my hen, before sitting it down on the table.

"You just need a wife or something to add in her and maybe a couple of kids" she ranted as I stared at this oven built bitch I didn't have nothing against fems but they weren't my type she was attractive but she was annoying and her front teeth crooked.

"Maybe one day but what about u are u seeing anybody" I asked changing the subject before I hurt this bitch feelings.

"No I'm single sadly" she said sighing playing with the him of her dress, I laughed in my head this bitch is something else for real.

"Damn a beautiful girl like u single, I can't believe what I'm hearing" I said gagging in my head as the words left from my mouth.

"Yea but hopefully I'll have somebody someday" she said looking into my eyes I could've slapped that bitch right then and there for saying some so fucking stupid.

"Yea hopefully, are u hungry?" I asked standing her as she nodded her head drinking out her glass.

"I'll be right back" I told her as she nodded again making me frown bitch if u don't answer me but I didn't say anything I just walked into the hall going into he storage room grabbing the long plastic sheet wrap and walked back into the living room laying it out across the floor.

"What's that for" she said looking up from her phone watching me lay the plastic sheet on the carpet and half on the wood floor.

"I always lay this down before people eat in her so nothing won't get in my carpet" I said trying to make the lie sound believable as possible.

"I see you like to keep things clean" she said looking back at her phone as I shook my head this dumb bitch actually believed that weak ass lie.

"Yea I do but I'm gonna go grab the food" I said going into the kitchen grabbing the to plates of pasta and carrying back into the living room sitting it on the table as she locked her phone picking up the plate, damn this big greedy bitch ain't even wait for me to sit down before she starting eating.

"You cooked this" she managed to get out as she continued to eat like she never ate before.

"Yea I did is it good" I said taking small bites out of my food to make this bitch feel like she greedy.

"Yes it is actually, that's another plus" she said smirking as she took a bite out the garlic bread, I sat my plate down as she finished the rest her food.

"Your not hungry" she asked sitting her plate by means I could've sworn I seen that bitch take a portion of my food off the plate when I turned my head.

"Nahh I ate real heavy all day" I said taking a downing the Hennessy, looking on the table behind her making sure the knife was in place.

"I haven't eaten all day i been busy with work for most of the day" she explained picking her phone back up it looks like she posted the food on her social media, I groaned mentally this iron board built bitch gots to go now, I stood up pulling her off the couch as I pulled her to me as we stood on the plastic.

"Your really beautiful" I said as I spun her around kissing down her neck as she closed her eyes melting into my arms, I smirked as I let me hands roam her body, she let out soft small moans as I gripped her neck.

"To bad your daddy a bitch" I said as she slowly opened her eyes but it was to late the knife was at her neck as I slit her throat watching the blood spill out her body, I dropped that bitch as she fell to the floor bleeding out, I dropped the knife and walked to my phone texting es letting her know to tell my dad the job was done, he didn't allow me to communicate with him either but he always had me working.

"That bitch got blood on my carpet I should kill this ugly bitch again" I said to myself as I got up checking her pulse seeing that she was indeed dead.

I pushed her body to the edge of the wrap and rolled her body up in the wrap, tapping the end, I should've put another layer down to hold the blood in but she was annoying me so my work was sloppy but I don't give a fuck the quicker I do this fuck ass jobs the sooner I can just relax and do whatever the fuck I want, I pat her legs getting up to grab the bleach spray to spray my floor before the blood stained my wood floor, I scrubbed the blood off the floor as my door flew open, I kept scrubbing knowing it was heaven and the clean up crew to get the bitch.

"You did a good job" I heard from behind me as I silently cussed as bleach soaked my gray sweats I just brought these and their a mess already, I pulled at my hair hearing footsteps behind me.

"Stop that shit man" stari growled as she snatched my hands off my hair pulling me into a hug as I just relaxed in her arms, she gave me a different kind of peace I wanted all the time, I couldn't wait to we get back to how we use to be, she lifted my head up as I looked into her eye she kissed my lips as I moaned into the bliss, she was a drug that I needed, I craved and I had to have, I needed her so bad that I would basically go crazy if I didn't have her.

"Can we come in" we jumped as she pulled away from the kiss getting up walking away toward the door as I just bit my lip standing up missing her lips on mine.

"Yea the body right there make this shit quick I got places to be" she demanded as the crew came in and started cleaning the rest of the blood and stuff up before grabbing the body.

Me and stari made eye contact as I touched my lips, she just smirked and walked off, she knew what she was doing I waited for them to finish after they were done I locked my door and headed up to my room to shower, I needed it after all that bitch left my mind clouded.

Yurrrr, just a little update for y'all, and make sure y'all go read my other book "jus love me" thank u.