|-| IDFC |-| Travis x Larry

Chapter 9- Panic Attacks and Child Proof Caps

                                [Panic Attacks and Child Proof Caps]
Warning, contains: Panic attacks and mentions of alcohol.
*heavy breathing* WE HIT 1k HOLY SHIT THANKS GUYS GALS AND NB PALS! Early chapter for y'all 💙💙

I slowly raised my head to see a concerned looking Todd, my thoughts still painfully loud. "Okay, try to take deep, slow breaths." He ordered. I tried to control my breathing, my grip on my hair loosening slightly. Breath, just fucking breath, please. My breathing slowly evened out, still quite ragged from my throat being raw. He smiled awkwardly and patted my shoulder. Guess he's not great at this. I managed to chuckle quietly, my thought beginning to quiet down slightly.

  "Okay, now, uh, name five things you can see." Todd mumbled. Confused on how this would help, I started to look around, counting the things I saw under my breath. "Couch, my- my sweater...hair bands, the door, " I murmured, eyes darting around the room nervously. Then my sight narrowed on Larry, shifting in his sleep. I took another deep breath. Stay calm, for him. Be strong for him. "Larry." I finished, my voice stronger than before.

  Todd continued to ease me by asking me to name off things till I calmed down, tears now dried and Larry laying in my lap once again. He asked me to say four things I felt, three things I smelled, and two things I tasted. It was kinda weird, but it helped calm me down, so fuck it. I looked up and gave Todd a weak smile. "Thanks, Todd. I feel a bit better now. What the fuck was that though?"

  He hummed in response. "It's a thing that tends to help people calm down from panic attacks. It gave you something to focus on other than what you were thinking about. Neil has them, so I studied about it." Todd explained, grinning at the mention of his boyfriend. I felt a pang of guilt. I remember being so fucking jealous of him and Neil. They were so open about who they are, and they didn't give a fuck what anyone said. Meanwhile, I was in heavy denial about who I was, and I fucked up and took it out on them and others.

  I looked back at Todd. "Hey, uh, I'm really sorry about all the things I did. It was fucked up, and I shouldn't have done it. I know this doesn't make what I did okay, but I'm trying to be better. I'm really sorry." I said, fresh tears falling down my cheeks. Fuck, I'm a cry baby. He smiled and shook his head. "It's okay, Travis. I understand your," he paused, "Situation at home wasn't too good." Then he turned his head back to my father. "Now, back to him."

  I sighed, stood up, and picked Larry up with much struggle. Im tired as hell, okay? I fucking choked my dad, I have a right to be exhausted right now. I carefully laid him down on the couch, kissing his forehead afterwards. He smiled fondly in his sleep, making butterflies go through my stomach and my cheeks to flush. I looked back at Ashley, who was supporting Sal so he could stand, and Todd. "Okay, I say we tie him to a chair or some shit." Todd and Ashley both quickly nodded. "While you guys get zip ties or some shit, I'm gonna go put Sally in Larry's bed so he doesn't do anything stupid." She explained, picking Sal up effortlessly. He giggled and twirled her hair as she walked into Larry's room.

"Well, there's a chance I have some ropes in my room from a recent project. I'll go get them, you stay here and watch Larry." Todd instructed, his face blushing slightly, walking to the door. I nodded as he left, wondering what the hell he's doing that needs rope. I heard a low groan and shifting behind me. "Travis?" I heard Larry whisper from the couch. I turned around, smiled, and stat down next to him, kissing his cheek.

"Hey, Larry, you okay? Well, other than the obvious?" I asked, eyes lingering on the bandages around his shoulder. It looks like it stopped bleeding, but it's still worrying, especially judging by how stained the bandages are. He blushed a brilliant pink and smiled, grabbing my hand gently. I grinned and interlocked our fingers. Fuck, I'm gay.