I can't love you

Chapter 12

Astrids POV:
The wedding just finished and we are having a celebration. There's music and food and wine. The day has been perfect I'm just waiting for the ball to drop. When's the bad part gonna happen. Right now I'm slow dancing with my now wife Rosanna. My hand is on her waist and hers on my shoulder then our free hands interlocked. I know she probably feels awkward but if I'm honest I enjoy this. I know she needs time before she can trust me again before she can love me like she used to but I don't. I've loved her every second of the past years even when I've been physical with others my love for her never died or even dimmed. I will wait for her. The song comes to an end and fast music is played while everyone dances like lunatics.

I sit down at the table. In two days I could be dead. In two days I could kill my brother, if I can even call him that. A war that doesn't need to happen. A war because of greed and selfishness. The deaths in this war will be pointless. I have to save as many of my people as I can. I just don't know how. The messenger he should be he soon, I can talk to him. I sprint out of the room, but everyone is either too distracted or too drunk to notice.

I go to the gate and the man appears. "Your here, I did what you said we are married now and I understand now. I need your help" I takes his hood off and I can see his face, jet black hair with bright blue eyes, thick eyebrows and dark eyelashes with a scar down the left side of his face. High cheek bones and a chiseled jaw line. "See this red stripe, all the people part of the rebellion are wearing them, you will see us on the front line with your brother when he says attack we will turn and hold them off while you battle singularly with your brother. When this ends I hope you can help us with places to live and jobs please." He looks sincere "of course it's the least I can do I will see you in two days time" he nods and starts to walk away before I shout "I never caught you name my friend." He turns and looks to me "Kole Woodson that is my name I will see you soon princess Astrid." He nods and walk away.

I walk back to the celebration and sit down. "Where'd you go?" Sarah asks. "I met with my brothers messenger Kole Woodson, we didn't say much but at least I now know his name." She nods. "Your married now, does this mean I won't get laid anytime soon" she half jokes. "Your very attractive I'm sure if you went into town and shouted someone have sex with me you have a line of hundreds of people. You can get laid anytime." I say in response. "Always friends" she holds out her pinky and I interlock hers with mine "always friends" then we let go. Today had been tiring. If I could, I would take my wife to bed and cuddle until we fell asleep but as she doesn't trust me we still have separate chambers. I guess I'll have to get used to being with someone but also alone. I lean over and kiss Sarah on the cheek "goodnight Sarah" I get up and walk to Rosanna. I kiss her forehead and say "I'm off to my chambers, when you're ready whether that's a week a month or a year you may join me" then I walk away.

I'm in my bed and have been for an hour or so when I hear a knock on the door. I walk over and open it. To my surprise it's Rosanna "I don't feel safe on my own with everything happening, can I stay." I just move aside and let her in closing the door behind her. "Your welcome anytime Rosanna I'm always here" we both get under the covers and she presses her back to my front. She's freezing. I lay here and watch as she breathes, so small and delicate. She turns around and looks at me "promise me you won't die in the battle, promise me you'll make it back alive, I know that right now we aren't exactly good but I don't want to lose you." I stroke her hair behind her ear. "I'm sorry love but I can't promise that, but I can promise that I will do everything I can to make sure I get back to you." She hugs her arms round my waist and holds tightly. "I don't want to lose you" she says. I put one arm under her head and the other over her back "sleep Rosanna... I love you". Slowly we fall asleep.

A/N
Is Rosanna finally forgiving Astrid for breaking her heart. Soon the battle will take place. Seems like Astrid has the upper hand but does she really, who will win in the end. Don't forget to vote hope you've all had a good day.