Violence In A Quiet Mind

Chapter 8.

The whole therapy thing was really helpful. Miss. Baker explained to me that losing someone really close to you is the hardest thing in life. It will be part of you but there are certain times you have to let it go because they will be happy to see you move on. She also explained that it's okay if I keep on writing my thoughts in my journal but they shouldn't have terrible ideas I would want to do to myself but they should have happy thoughts and wonderful memories I spent with the ones I lost. As a therapist she knew a lot about pain, death and looses. I told her about my journal and she had read everything in it. She had a sad look on her face but she smiled after reading it. I understood I wasn't myself when writing terrible thoughts in my book. Later she got me a new journal and made sure I wrote all the memorable events I shared with Jenny and my dad.

A month with Miss. Baker has been helpful. I am moving on slowly, I open up with mum, talk to her and my nightmares were starting to fade. I was happy and I really owed it to Miss. Baker. As of now, mum had left to the supermarket to get some groceries as I was at home watching television. The series I was watching was so amazing that I got interrupted by a ring on the doorbell. I grumble getting up from the comfortable couch, straighting my wrinkled dungaree to check who it was.

"Hi." The girl who I assumed to be of my age waved at me.

"Can I help you?" I gaze at her before checking outside if she was alone.

"Yeah I wanted to invite you to my house warming party." The caramel skin girl smiles at me revealing her white teeth.

"I'm sorry but I cant. You see I'm new here and all." I tried to decline her request of going to some party. I wasn't ready to make friends. She sigh and looked disappointed but she replaced it with a forced smile.

"Then in case you change your mind you are invited. Here's the address." She handed me a designed paper with House warming party written on it with her address. She waved at me and left. I closed the door and went back to the series placing the paper on the coffee table not bothering myself over it. I still had my issues to take care of and I had to accomplish them before opening up to other people. Maybe I can talk to Miss. Baker about it, I thought, not concentrating on the television anymore.

"Honey come help me with the groceries." Mum came home after an hour later. I was getting bored at home. "Okay." I beamed, stretching myself before helping her with the rest of the groceries. After packing everything she set out preparing lunch. I thought about how she helped me with everything even though I was being stubborn from our old town till now. "Mum I am sorry for not opening up and causing a lot of trouble." I confessed. She looked at me stunned by my out of nowhere apology and she smiled. "I forgive you. Time forgets the casualties. As long as you are good and happy I am happy." She kisses the crown of my head and we start with lunch. Time flew by and it is now six thirty in the evening as we arranged the table to eat. I guess all our cooking and talking about happy moments really sailed with time.

"Mum, when you went out, I was invited to some party by this girl and I didn't know whether to go. So I told her no, do you think it's okay?" I blurted hoping she tells me I didn't do the right thing.

"I understand you honey if you rejected it considering your place now." She noted smiling and I sigh.

"Thanks mum."

We finished with the food, cleaned the dishes and sat in front of the television watching a wish upon a star. Mum didn't make it halfway through the movie as she slept. I stood up from the couch slowly to grab a blanket to cover her as I continued way hung the movie. The credits rolled in as my eyelids got heavy as sleep took over.