《 One Direction Fluff and sickfics 》 >> Niall centric <<

² Anxiety

Summary:

Well... Niall has an anxiety before an concert and the boys try to comfort him but Niall just don't want to admit that he got anxiety.
- no ship. Just Zianouarry friendship, Ziall mostly

***
"Ready for tonight, boys?", Lou asked while spraying some hairspray on Harry's curls.
The youngest one closed mouth and eyes to get the spray to stay outside.

"You bet!", Louis laughed, looking at Liam like he couldn't wait for the waterfight, they were going to have.
"I'm always excited!", Liam said and ignored Louis little threat.

Niall lowered his gaze from watching his friend too his hands. They were trembling.
He didn't know what it was but he felt nervous about tonight... even a little panicked.
The door swung open and Zayn strolled in, presenting his leather jacket too the other boys.

Liam whistles and winks at the younger boy.
Niall just smirks. Zayn is really do be looking beautiful.
All the boys do... except for Niall.

No... he isn't thinking that about himself but he's suddenly afraid that the other could think that. That the fans think that way.
Niall really didn't want to get out on stage tonight. He would prefer to stay in bed for the next twenty years and scream into his pillow.

He didn't want to be in the spotlight again, didn't wanted to be watched by thousand of fans and recorded by just as much phones which made it possible for him to be seen by another few million people... in a bad way.

He suddenly was afraid of slipping on stage or playing a wrong chord on his guitar or...
"Niall?"

The addressed one looked up at Liam who seemed to be the one wo had spoken too him.
"Yeah?", Niall responded. He didn't want to say too much, afraid his voice could give away his fear.
"You look really pale dude.", Zayn said while taking place infront of Lou now.

"He's always pale.", Harry shrugged and then grinned at Niall.
Niall just shook his head yes.
"Yeah but not in a sick way.", Louis spoke now and made Niall flinch. He wasn't sick... well physically.
But he really felt sick and like he wanted to trow up all over the floor.

Only now he recognised his trembling hands and put them into fists, hoping the other boys hadn't noticed. He even hoped so when the boys smiled slightly at him but then he met Zayns eyes. He had turned in the makeup stool and shot the Irish lad a worried look.

Niall sighed.
It was probably too loud because Zayn stood up, against Lou's protest, and got on his knees infront of Niall. He took his small trembling hands in his slightly bigger ones.

The blonde boy met eyes with the Bradford boy and got an warm smile in reward.
"Niall... I know how anxiety looks."
Niall eyes widened as he watched the older boy talk.

"And you know that I would've already broken down without the help of you guys." He gestured to the boys around them.
"And now you obviously need help."

Niall shook his head.
He didn't want to have stuff like that. His knee could be threatened with operations but his mind? He didn't want to go crazy!

Zayn opened his mouth like he could read Nialls thoughts.
"It's always hard to admit. But after you did we can he-"
"I don't have anxiety!", Niall interrupted him.

Liam, Louis and Harry only furrowed their brows, watching their friend helpless.
"It's just a... stagesicknis I guess. I'm just nervous, that's all.", Niall explained in a much calmer tone now.

Zayn frowned but let it go and went back too Lou, getting hair and make up done.
Niall stood up and left the room. He needed some space and time for himself.

Anxiety.

Niall didn't liked the word.
It sounded so... weak. It would make him so vulnerable.
He opened the door for the rest room and locked it behind him.

Anxiety.

No, Niall told himself. He was just nervous. Most time he was but then the excitement won. Not this time.
Just thinking about going out on stage made his stomach turn.

He stumbled to the toilet and opened it, ready to throw up.
A knock on the door made him flinch.
"Nialler?", he heard Zayn ask. "Could you open the door for me please?"

Niall grumbled but decided to listen and unlocked the door.
Zayn came in and took place next to Niall on the ground.
"You know it's not just nervousness.", the older boy whispered and put an arm around the blond boys shoulder.

Even if he hated the thought, Niall nodded.
"I hope you also know that there is nothing bad about having anxiety?"
Niall frowned at Zayn.
"No... I mean it's bad to have it. It's scary. But I mean it's nothing to be ashamed of. Anxiety is just as bad as a broken bone or some other physical sickness."

Niall fumbled with his thumbs before answering.
"But anxiety sounds so... crazy. I don't want to be crazy."
Zayn sighed.
"You aren't crazy. A lot people in show business have anxiety problems."
"I don't want to be one of them!"

Zayn sighed again but smiled this time.
"But you can call you lucky. A lot people have to go through this alone. They're afraid of telling anyone because they have no one to trust enough. But you have us. You got four brothers to help you through this. You guys did it for me last year and now it's my turn."

"It's a lot harder to have it than to help someone with it.", Niall mumbled.
"Yeah... yeah it is."
"It feels like I can't breath. I mean I have oxygen in my lungs but I still can't breath... it's like...uhm..."
"Like being imprisoned in your own body.", Zayn ended the sentence and Niall nodded.

"It's like I want to scream but..."
"So why don't you do it?"
"What?"
"Scream."

Zayn positioned himself infront of Niall and embraced him in a tight hug. And then Niall let out a scream.
He screamed, the noise slightly muffled by Zayns shoulder. But the brunette only tighten his grip around Nialls shoulders and holds him till he stopped screaming, even then he didn't let go.

Niall recognised the door opening but didn't even tried to lift his head until he felt another pair of arms wrap around him from behind.
He turned his head to look in Harry's green eyes, watching him lovely.
Louis took place on Nialls left and wrapped his arms around the three boys... well he tried but his arms were way too short for that.
"We help you get through that."

Liam was the last one to sit down on the floor and complete the hug.
"You're our brother, Niall. We'll going through this... together. "

"Togheter.", Niall repeated.

***

My second one is out. What do you guys think?

I hope you liked it.

love ya'll

xx