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"hey." i said, approaching my sister and her locker.
"oh, hey! so, how you doin'?" tori asked. "feeling wonky about... jade..?"
"uhm, nah." i shook my head, although i didn't sound too convincing. "i think i got my wonk under control-"
"sh- sh. be cool." tori said, pointing out that beck and jade were approaching us.
"okay- be cool, be cool."
"i said be cool!-" tori whined.
"shut up." i whispered, sharply.
"what's up?" beck greeted.
"hey," jade greeted. "so... can i hear the song?"
"uh, oh- yeah. i just gotta-"
i was interrupted by cat, jumping past us on moon boots, and squealing excitedly. "hii!! byee!!" she giggled.
we shook our heads in confusion.
"so, the song?" jade said, turning our attention back to our previous conversation.
"hm?" i said.
"jade wants to hear the song you guys recorded together." tori elaborated, trying to bring my head out of space.
"oh, yeah." i nodded. "yeah. i'll email it to you. you know, via the internet."
"via?" jade frowned.
"don't you think you guys should listen to the song together?" beck asked, scratching his head.
"no. why together? she can listen to it by herself. i didn't do anything. i'm good." i panicked.
"okay... email it to me." jade shrugged in confusion.
"maybe you are in love with jade." tori said, turning to me after the couple had walked away.
"sh- don't say that. i've only known the girl for about a week."
"but what if you are?"
"i am." i murmured.
"you are?!" tori exclaimed.
"no, stop it! agh!" i groaned.
i bumped into robbie as i hurried down the hallway.
"sorry, tatiana!" he smiled.
"i can't talk about it!" i grolwed, pushing him out of the way and sending him flying into the lockers.
✄
"last night, i couldn't sleep, so i stayed up all night and wrote a song about jade. i didn't want to tell you about it because i knew you'd probably laugh at me." i told my sister.
"aww, you wrote her a song? that's so sweet." tori gushed.
"shut up. it's not. it's wrong, she's with beck." i replied, although part of me was seething with jealousy. who cares about beck- no. i have to respect their relationship. how do even know jade isn't straight? i don't.
"ok, wait. wait. the song you wrote about her; you expressed your feelings in that song, right?"
"yeah." i shrugged.
"so just sing her that song, and then you can get over her."
"if i sing her that song, then she's gonna know how i feel. and then i'm basically outing myself."
"jade doesn't have to know that the song's is about her." tori reasoned.
"her name's in it like ten times," i rolled my eyes, and shoving some cashew nuts in my mouth. "ugh, i hate nuts!" i spat them out in my hand and threw them in the disposal.
"so, just change all the 'jades' to 'baby'." she shrugged.
"baby?" i hummed. "yeah, baby could be anybody."
"uh-huh," tori nodded, beaming. "and then you sing your song tomorrow night at school. at the friday night concert. you'll even get extra credit for your assignment. jade will be in the audience, and you can sing her your song, and she'll never even know it's for her."
"i don't know if i can do it," i murmured. "i'm feeling very emotional."
"you want andre and i to sing it with you?" my sister offered.
