The Shadow of Eudaimonia

Chapter 10: Of Rumors and Questions

During recess, almost all of Calvin's classmates were down at the canteen. He was arguing with himself whether he would have enough energy to eat downstairs and be quick enough to go back to his room, or rather starve to death on his lonely seat. He was too caught up thinking about killing anyone who stared at him like a charity-work this morning that he totally forgot buying snacks before going up to his room. He looked around and noticed a few of his classmates were gossiping. Of course, he doesn't know the name of any of them. But with nothing else to do, he eavesdropped.

"Yeah Sasha is such a real bitch, isn't she?" one of the girls said.

"Classmates! I don't care if you don't respect me," another girl said with an exaggerated whiny voice, obviously mocking someone, "but please respect our adviser" the girl laughed and gave a sloppy five to the other girl. From there he knew they were talking about the class president who just gave the exact same line earlier when their teacher walked out on them.

"Come now, she's a Leo. It's her nature to be a natural-born bitch." Then they laughed again.

With that, Calvin wondered what these bored and wicked people think of him when he's not around. Probably weird, he thought. Or a tragedy. Someone broken. But surely it was worse than that. Ever since his mother died, he had shut the world around him. People most of the time disappoint. That's what Calvin learned. Like how his mother disappointed him. Unfortunately, at the same time, he didn't know people were spreading rumors that he was just acting tough and doesn't exactly show his true colors. So, before he could defend himself, his classmates had already passed judgement upon him. They might have given him a funny nickname—Creepy Calvin, or something stupid like that.

"Hey!" Calvin jerked his head to see who called him. It was the girl from earlier. "Do you want some snacks? I have some extra." She offered a sandwich wrapped in a paper towel. Calvin might be imagining it but he smelled the toasty sweet smell of the bread.

"No." he answered cold as steel.

"Oh, okay then, maybe I'll eat this delicious sandwich all by myself."

Calvin took a glance at the girl. She was pretty: having fair skin, pink lips, prominent cheekbones and beautiful shiny long dark hair. Calvin wondered if she has been this pretty ever since? Or was he just too caught in the little shitty world that he failed to notice her.

"I don't need your food." Calvin lied, whispering to himself.

"My name is Cleo by the way, short for Cleopatra," she shared, still with that peachy voice "I figured that you don't know, or can't remember. But that's okay."

"Did I ask you? I don't think so." But Calvin thought it was a beautiful name. "What do you need from me?"

"Nothing you just look—"

"Look what? Like a tragedy? Look Cleo, I'm not your broken boy to fix. Get lost or I'll take your sandwich."

"I was gonna say you look like you need a friend."

"Okay, that's it!" Calvin pushed himself to stand and stole the sandwich from Cleo's hand. "I'm taking this."

"You're such a dork. Acting tough and all."

"Get out of my face." He tore open the paper towel and gobbled on the sandwich, not caring if a dash of mayo had smeared on his lips.

"Why don't we hang out later? Maybe we can walk home together?"

"What the fuck do you really want? You want my crutches or something?"

"Why are you so grumpy?"

"Why are you so cheerful?" Calvin asked back.

"Because you're cute."

Calvin was shocked to hear that which made him pause for a second. "Look Cleo, if you're going to flirt, flirt with someone else. I don't need any of that shit."

"Okay, no flirting then. But I do want something from you." Calvin sighed and wobbled back to his seat. "Can we be friends?"

"No." he answered in a heartbeat.

"What if I take your crutches?"

"Still no, and you would probably regret it."

"Really?" she smiled coyly. "I like you already."

"Look if you want payment to your sandwich, I'll give it to you. Just leave me alone."

"I don't need your money. I just want to know more about you." suddenly the cheery tone of her voice mellowed down for a second. Calvin scoffed at the idea of her interest in him. "Like what is it like when you were struck by lightning?"

He looked outside the window at the gloomy ashen sky. "I don't remember much actually."

Cleo frowned. "That's...well, that's okay. It must have been so traumatic, sorry for bringing that up."

Calvin didn't respond. His mind lingered on the word traumatic. It had never occurred to him that it was but thinking about it now, he's scared that the sky would turn dark and something from the sky would fall again.

"You're very lucky though." Cleo added. It was a sentence he heard almost every time now and frankly Calvin was tired of it.

Calvin scoffed. "Lucky? If I'm lucky, I wouldn't be talking with you right now."

Cleo looked around the room as if looking for someone or waiting for something. "Don't say that." Calvin found it weird but he tried to ignore it.

"How could someone struck by lightning and still live be lucky?"

"Um, because you're still alive?"

"Assuming I still want to live," he rebutted.

Cleo stared at Calvin's dark brown eyes searching for levity but found nothing. "That's a terrible thing to say. Life is a wonderful thing. There is a lot in this planet that you haven't explored yet, you know?"

Calvin shook his head. "Yeah, but people are awful. Fuck them all. They do terrible things to this world and to others."

"Well what if you can change that? What if you have the ability to bring out peace and harmony in the entire universe, would you do it?"

"What kind of beauty queen question shit is that? And why are you asking me all these questions?"

Cleo smiled. "Come on, just a curious question. To lighten up the mood!"

Calvin sighed. "I don't think human beings are capable of fucking peace and harmony. We're all greedy violent self-centered creatures that genuinely believe that we're always right. I think it's in our nature to force our beliefs on others and at the same time not listen to any of it at all. It's like we've been hard-wired to do that."

"I see you're a bit of a cynic. But let's say you could change their heart for example? Let's say you could control them at your will so no one would hate on others, no more arguments, no more disagreements, no more pride, just one united collective mind? Would you do it?"

"Collective mind? You mean like the book Cell?"

"Cell?"

"Yeah written by Stephen King! You haven't heard of it? The one with—" Calvin bellowed like a sinister ghoul and stared aimlessly across the room. Some of his classmates jerked their head and stared at him confused at what the fuck was happening. He immediately stopped realizing how weird he looked. He cursed for letting his guard down. It doesn't help that Cleo did not even laugh to diffuse the awkwardness. She just stared at him as if waiting for him to say more about it.

"Why are you talking to me anyway?" he asked awkwardly to change the topic. He looked over the window again and his heart skipped when he realized soft spots of drizzle began to fall outside.

"I dunno, really. I think I like you."

Calvin scoffed. That's a first, he thought.

"No—I mean, I think we can get along, really well." Cleo smiled.