Seeing in Color

Twenty

Connor

How come Travis got the good ones?

I knew from the start that my older brother had a crush on Katie. It was the most obvious crush he had ever had; and it was the only one I saw not working.

Don't get me wrong; Katie was a looker. She had smooth skin, long brown hair, gentle emerald eyes, and nimble fingers. She looked like a dryad from mythology (that's what my brother had mentioned) and she had this serene aura around her.

Then there was my brother. With his messy brown hair, mischievous smirk that sent him to the principle's office weekly, and thirst for trouble, he was hard to tame. He always needed attention. A friend, a girlfriend. By his first year of high school, he was already on his fifth girlfriend. He and Katie were poplar opposites; one hated people and preferred silence, the other caused trouble and loved drama. I couldn't see them working out, as much as I was hoping it would.

Yes, it may seem that I am jealous of my brother. That's one hundred percent true. But not because I was just as infatuated with Katie as my brother – which I wasn't – or that I wanted Katie for myself – which I don't – but because my brother got himself another girl.

Growing up with a cunning, attractive older brother, I was now used to being the third wheel. All my friends started out as his friends. All the girls became his girlfriend or admirer. I was just an afterthought. A free drink with the meal. Or maybe the bag of chips... I was never the lucky one.

First, I lost the only true friend I ever had – my brother.

My other brother.

Then my mom decided she loved Travis more and pampered him, and I got all the hand-me-downs and extra chores. I got a waffle-fryer for Christmas when he got an Xbox, and then our cat pushed it off the counter and it shattered. Did I get a replacement? No. When Travis's Xbox froze and wouldn't reset, did my mother buy him an entire new Xbox? Yes. Who got the broken Xbox? The cat.

No, just kidding. I got the broken Xbox and had my friend Leo (who was Travis's friend first) fix it.

Long story short, when I looked down from the balcony and saw my brother flirting with Katie on the trampoline, I was filled with jealousy.

Why couldn't I get a cute girl to like me?

Why was I always over-looked?

"Connor, did you run the dishwasher yet?" I heard my mother yell from the study on the other end of the house. Her voice echoed across the walls and to my ears from where I sat scrolling through my phone at the bar in the kitchen. I sighed and glanced at the dishwasher. It had a green button on, and I could hear the water running.

"Yes, Mom, the dishwasher is running! Do you need me to go catch it?"

Silence. She only laughed at Travis's jokes.

I glanced at my sleeve and rolled the fabric up, exposing my soulmate tattoo. It was still a blur, as if someone rubbed charcoal or black eyeshadow on my bicep. I sighed.

Will I ever find my soulmate?

I slid off the chair and picked up my backpack, ready to head out the door once Travis came down the stairs. I walked to the end of the banister and yelled up the stairs.

"Travis! We're going to be late!"

Silence.

"He left already!" My mother yelled. I frowned and walked into her office by the stairs. She was hunched over her computer, her fingers in a blur on the keyboard. She had her short brown hair pulled back by a yellow scrunchie, the ends sticking out like a hedgehog. She looked up with glazed eyes and frowned.