The Search for Serenity

2 - The Small Things

- Alice -

Stepping through the white-painted door of my small home, the welcoming and familiar smell of mom's vanilla-scented candles drifts through the air, immersing me in a comforting warmth that shakes off the cold from the damp world outside. The light grey walls on the interior and pots of green plants add to the cosy atmosphere.

I hang up my coat, kicking my sneakers off, and step into the living room where mom is seated on the couch wearing her scrubs, giving me the indication she'd just come home from her shift at the hospital. She's quiet as she goes through her mail. I stand on the outskirts of the cosy room, decorated in a way that screams 'safety'. Mom takes great pride in decorating the house, making it feel safe with not only the décor, but the feeling of care and belonging. This isn't just a house, it's a home.

She eventually spots me in the doorway and I walk over to her, hugging her tightly before taking a seat beside her.

"Hey, mom, how was work?"

Placing her letters on the table, she returns the embrace before pulling away and offering me her full attention, smiling warmly at me like she usually does, her eyes shining with adoration.

I sink comfortable into the couch, my legs crossed, facing her as she sits back and picks up the glass of water that was resting on the coffee table.

"It was okay, sweetie. I'll be home a little late tomorrow and I won't be here on time to welcome you from your first day back at school this year, are you alright with that?" She asks gently.

"Of course, mom, it's no trouble," I nod my head in understanding, trying not the let the sinking feeling in my stomach show on my face. The late shifts are becoming more frequent and not only can it be lonely here alone, I worry of her. I brush off my worry before she can notice, "Would you like me to leave you some dinner out?"

"That would be lovely."

"Great, want me to cook us dinner tonight? How about your favourite? You can rest in the meantime and take a bath, then we can watch a movie if you're up for it?" I suggest enthusiastically, thinking of how much I love cooking and sending mom's need for a pick-me-up.

"You mean your incredible lasagne? I could never pass up on such an opportunity," She beams at me. "Now tell me, how was your time with Jade today? Did you girls have a nice time?" She asks interestedly, resting her chin on her hand, elbow on her knee.

I smile, thinking back to the conversations we had. "We did, it was good to be able to catch up again after so long," I tell her, "she told me about her girlfriend she met in California. Apparently, she taught her how to surf, I'm so happy for her.

"That's lovely, sweetie. I'm glad you got to catch up before school starts again. I still can't believe you're going into your senior year, I'm so proud of you. Before you know it, Alice, You'll be off to college and becoming the greatest photographer the world has ever seen." She coos brightly, bringing a hand up to my face to pinch one of my rosy cheeks.

"Mom," I drawl out, blushing, "You know that's hugely unlikely and optimistic. No, scratch that, unrealistic." I say, tilting my head to the side and chuckling at her high hopes.

She squints her dark brown eyes and looks directly into my own matching ones, leaning forward. I prepare myself for one of her motivational scolds. "Dream big, Alice. There are no restrictions to what you can achieve, only you get to determine that." She speaks the wise words I've heard a few times from her before, "Prove all your doubts wrong, prove the world wrong, and be who you want to be. Believe in yourself just as I believe in you."

I can't help the small half-smile that arises on my face. Her earnest words always make me feel cherished.

"I need to go freshen up. You good to start making dinner? I'm famished."