I Want You To Know

Chapter 42

Dean POV:

I prepare steak, mashed potatoes, and green beans for dinner, hoping Seth will eat a little. I enjoyed cooking since he got used to my skill at our house. I loved the process, the smells, the creativity of it all.

I'm thankful for the large freezer that I've invested in because I have plenty of food if he refuses. I grumble at the thought and feel embarrassed of my love that still doesn't let him understand my feelings. Has my work not enough to show him how much I love him?

How could he not see that I was trying to show him what it was already between us? I do everything for his own good, not for my selfishness. I follow him like a ghost to make his words true, not to get pleasure from torturing him.

I sigh and try to concentrate on the cooking until I hear his voice from the basement, "Dean!"

I can hear him yell my name, muffled from the floorboards below my feet. I have to go and check on what's bothering him. I wash my hands and dry it with the towel before entering the root cellar.

Somehow, he manages to pull himself into a sitting position and folds his arms awkwardly where they are cuffed to the bed. He shakes his legs slightly as his eyes lock onto me. He swallows hard, obviously embarrassed to say what he is about to. "Ugh, I have to piss."

I laugh at his statement and walk over to him, thinking about how to keep him safe. I make quick work to the cuff which is connected to the bed and put it on my wrist, dragging him to the bathroom.

I turn around while he is doing his business and make sure he's not uncomfortable. I take him to the room again and cuff him to the bed. As I turn to leave, a smile creeps on my lips as I hear his voice from behind, "Thank you."

I close my eyes and let the words sink in me before climbing the stairs and closing the door. Hope blooms in me that he will understand my feelings soon. The love between us let everything happen on its way.

A few minutes later, I return to the root cellar with his food. By the look on his face, I can tell he won't eat a single bite if I beg or plead with him. It doesn't matter this time because I've planned well how to feed him.

I grab a chair and take a seat in it, grinning at him as I prop my feet on the mattress. I cut the steak and pop a piece into my mouth, savoring the taste of the meat as I chew. "It's delicious. I didn't cook this much good before."

He stares at me angrily as he sits in the same awkward position as before. "Did you not come to try and feed me again?" He asks, biting his lips nervously.

"Nope," I reply quickly, even if I'm pretty sure he gets out of his attitude slowly. "Why did I want to do that? You would refuse me anyway if I tried to, so I just left that option." I shrug and continue eating the food.

He rolls his eyes and curses something under his breath before spitting at me, "I hope you choke on it."

"That's not nice," I say and pop another piece into my mouth.

"Are you really going to eat in front of me?" He asks softly. He never understands my feelings unless he knows about me. There are a lot of things he needs to know about me.

I stop for a second and notice him watching at me with an intense glare. "Oh, I'm sorry. I think you want some, right?" I ask teasingly, holding the plate toward him.

"No. I don't need your pity on me." He mumbles and tries to look away, but his eyes don't budge. "If you have any kindness, you will feed me without I ask."

I laugh and admire his cuteness as he eyes the plate. "What if poisoned it?" I ask and eat a few forkfuls of mashed potatoes. "Did you not think if I wanted you dead, I would have done it by now?"

He shrugs and watches my fork load up with more potatoes and green beans. He licks his lips as his eyes follow the movement from my plate to mouth. He is starving, but if he acts like a child, I will treat him like one.

We stay in silence for several minutes and stare at each other. The sound of utensils scratch a plate is the only noise echoing the room until his stomach growls loudly. He shifts and tries to cover it up from me, but I get it.

"Are you hungry?" I ask, knowing well what his answer will be. I knew him well than any other one, even if we were staying together for a few months. Both Seth and Colby's version of him is stubborn as hell to understand something that I'm telling until they know about it.

"No." He mumbles and looks away, having no heart to take his eyes off the food. Without his control, his stomach grumbles again and lets me know his lie.

I raise an amused eyebrow at him, "It sounds like you're hungry."

"Leave me alone." He says through gritted teeth.

"You can have the rest of it if you want." I offer, showing the plate to him. "I've been eating it, so it's not poisoned."

He looks back at me and the plate that is in my hand. The wheels in his pretty head turn slowly as he considers my offer. He nods unhappily, but the need for food wins out ultimately.

My heart almost leaps out of my chest when he nods. Without wasting the time, I move to sit on the mattress next to him, making sure I'm close enough so he won't spill anything. I should feed him fast before he changes his mind.

I load the fork with a piece of steak and some potatoes before holding it out for him. I need to fill his tummy and make sure he's not worried about anything. I know it's stupid if I don't want him to worry about the situation.

Though he seems to fight with himself, he takes the offered food and chews it faster than I can load the fork. Within minutes, the plate is clean, and his stomach is filled. "Is it so difficult?" I ask, grabbing a glass of water and moving it to his lips.

He sips the water and looks around for something before rubbing his mouth on my jacket. He leans back on his side and glances at me, "Did you cook the food?"

"Of course," I smile and pick Kev in my arms, petting its head. I have to feed this Yorkie before it barks and crawls on the floor helplessly. I get up from the bed slowly with Kev and flash a small smile at Seth.

"It was good." He says and plays with the cuff. "Can you do me a favor?" He breathes out, glancing up at me.

"I'll do anything other than let you go," I say, looking into his eyes. I don't know what he is going to ask me, but I hope he will ask the thing that I can give it to him.

He sighs, "Don't feed these to Kev if he tortures you. His body won't settle with any of this."

I nod slowly and leave the root cellar without saying anything. Even in his slow approach, I could see the uncomfortable loneliness in his eyes, and that made me feel bad for keeping him there. I have to do something about it later.