Different Paths to Destiny [Game of Thrones]

3: Storms

" close my eyes on this violent night
I'm still here, dead in your life "

I lay in my tent trying to nap, but sleep refused to come. I was too on edge. The war was making me nervous. It wasn't so much that I was scared we'd lose, I had a good feeling about this. I was just tense from sitting through war councils with batty old men all day. I wanted an afternoon of peace, but I couldn't even nap.

The tent flaps parted, and Catelyn came in to distract me from my feeble attempts at rest. "I thought you were leaving today?" I asked, standing up. I stopped a few paces ahead of her, to rearrange the things on my vanity.

"I'm going in the morning, I just wanted to speak with you first, Amina," she said.

"Oh?"

"I want you to know I've always considered you part of this family. I practically raised you after all."

"Of course, I know that." I wondered where this was going. I knew Catelyn loved all her children fiercely, me included. But it was unusual for her to go about telling us these things, without a point to make. I picked up a chain of flowers, remembering an afternoon spent with Jon in Winterfell. I slowly braided my hair, adding the flowers in as I went.

"You're to marry Robb as soon as the war is over. It would've been sooner, but as you know there were many complications." I nodded, still not knowing where this was leading. "I'm aware you don't love him."

I was completely caught off guard. For a moment, I just stood there gaping at her, the flowers and braid entirely forgotten. "I-" She held up a hand to silence me.

"Don't bother denying it. I'm well aware of the many things that go on in my household." She stepped towards me and resumed the braiding. "I, myself, am proof that even someone who didn't love the man they were to marry can make things work. Over the years I grew to love Ned, I do not doubt that you can grow to love Robb in the same way."

"But things are different with me. If you really know everything that goes on behind closed doors, then you'd know that."

"Of course I do, but don't think your situation is anything special. Everyone has a first love. When I was young there was only one man I wanted to marry, and I know you've heard how that ended. But Ned and I raised five beautiful children, not to mention you. I love my family with all my heart. You'll understand one day, no matter how you feel now."

I didn't know what to say. We stood in silence as she finished my braid and secured it with a leather tie. She touched my arm and looked at me. "Amina, you are going to make an amazing queen. I could've changed my mind about having you marry Robb, but you will be good for him. You truly were meant to rule. You are determined, and smarter than anyone gives you credit for. And you're kind, something kings and queens these days take for granted. People will listen to you, not only that, but people will like you."

"I think I'll make an excellent queen," I said quietly.

"The best these seven kingdoms have seen in quite a long time," Catelyn said.

"And without Robb I'll never get there." It wasn't really meant to be a question, I knew it was true. It would never matter how kind, or how fit to rule I was. No one would accept a Targaryen ruler.

"You know what lies in your heart, only you can know that. But I can see what you're meant for. You have a choice, everyone does, and I just hope you know how to make the right one. Rarely is it only about your happiness, it's about everyone else's." She kissed me on the cheek before moving towards the entrance to my tent. "Robb doesn't need to know we had this talk."