In The Clear | ✓

15 | bring it on

Jensen's mood sunk the moment lunch ended and she and Scott were escorted back to their interview room. She considered leaving. But having Scott deal with them by himself was terrible and Jensen wasn't going to do that. She always told Rocky that if she didn't want something done to herself, don't do it to others. Even without Rocky in the building, Jensen knew she still needed to practice what she preached. Her guilty conscience wouldn't allow her not to.

Microphones and press boxes were reclipped to shirts and waistbands. Jensen finished another bottle of water than Blaine had given her.

"Hello!"

Jensen jumped at the sound of Camilla Morales' voice. Too close for comfort even when Jensen was used to it in her headphones. Her hair was tied back in a tight bun, eyeliner winged to the heavens. Everything about seeing Camilla in person made Jensen's skin crawl, hands itching to tear out her eyes and rip off her ears. Never to be seen or heard again.

"Hi," Scott said. Stiff. Not his usually bubbly self.

Jensen swallowed hard. "Hello."

Giovanni walked in after Camilla, sitting down beside her. They shook hands with the two podcast hosts. Jensen tried not to think about squeezing too hard or whether they were squeezing too hard. She focused on how the faster she cooperated, the faster she could get out of there. The faster she could think about her Diana Thomas offer. Jensen was going to hold onto that.

"Firstly," Giovanni said when they were hooked up to their microphones, he motioned to Jensen. "Huge congratulations on the new addition."

"Thanks," Jensen said. "We're looking forward to meeting them."

"Any names you have planned?"

"We have a couple," Jensen said. "But we don't want to talk about them publicly yet."

"Do you want more kids after this one?" Camilla asked.

"At one point I wanted three. And Miles and I have talked about it." Jensen cleared her throat. "But, um, I had really bad—" Jensen took a deep breath. Was she really about to say this for other people to hear? Giving a technical exclusive to the worst podcast she knew? "I had really, you know, intense post-partum, um, depression. So we're going to see what happens after this baby arrives."

"You've never spoken about this before," Giovanni said.

"I don't spend a lot of time wanting to think about it," Jensen said.

"Is there anything you want to say about it for our listeners?"

Jensen swallowed hard and shifted in her seat. "Do you have any questions?"

"Any advice?"

"Um," Jensen said as she twisted the stud in her nose, "you're not as alone as you feel like you are."

"Maybe we should talk about the movie," Scott said, "or something else."

Jensen shot him a look that she hoped was enough of a thank you for that moment. Scott nodded softly. She tried to swallow the lump in her throat. There was a time when a therapist told her that talking about things would eventually make her feel better about what was bothering her. Jensen had the feeling Camilla Morales and Giovanni Perez weren't the kind of people her therapist had meant.

"Fair enough," Giovanni said. "We recently saw that your husband—"

"His name's Miles," Jensen said.