STOLEN DANCE
❝Oi- Little Diggory, if you wanna ask me to the Ball you should probably do so, like yesterday. As you can tell, ladies are lining up just to get a chance to ask me.❞
❝Literally no one has asked you to the dance, F...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
✦✧✦
From: Jonah
To: The Bane of My Existence (Cress)
Dear Cress,
I heard what happened. Axel, your vibrant friend who calls you 'Mo'--remember him?--went into a tangent about how Umbridge was the worst for sending you to St. Mungo's. Even suggested we take her out. Stealthily, of course. Though, I doubt that he could pull that off with his track record. Was he not the one who threatened Lee Jordan with bodily harm in his firstyear of school? Did he actually go through with that, by the way? It's very interesting that the entire school knows about it yet nothing really happened. Odd, indeed.
Anyway, I'm right pissed that you're getting help from someone else. How else am I supposed to exploit you if you're not here for me to exploit? I need expensive things, Cress, and Malfoy just isn't cutting it anymore, I'm afraid. Come back soon so I can drain your wallet at Hogsmeade.
With all the hate I can muster,
Jonah Spencer. xoxo
November 15, 1995
━
From: The Bane of Your Existence, Apparently
To: Jonah
Jonah,
Words cannot describe the hatred I hold for you. I knew you were using me for my money, but the fact that you are so blatantly openabout it makes me rage. Next time I see you, I promise I'm going to hex you ten years into the future.
I do hope Marigold is doing well, however. Sadly, because you sought me out first, I feel an obligation to speak to you. If I had a choice, I would have been Marigold's friend rather than yours. But here we are. I hope your fucking banshee robe fucking screams until your ears bleed. I hope it shrinks and then you get short as well so I can punch you in the face.
Also, what are you on about with Malfoy? Don't tell me you're exploiting him as well... Jonah, I get it, I do. I would love to exploit Malfoy, but he smells and is stinky -- personality wise. Like, he's awful. I wouldn't go near him if you paid me. You could do so much better. Aim your sights higher. There are plenty of people out there that aren't fuckwads.
