Love is Pain (Forth&Beam)

Bitter Truth

Beam was sitting on the cold ground

He wrapped both his hands tightly around his legs,his head was on his knees

He was painfully crying with sobs

He did not understand what was hurting him the most.The mother who was the only member of his family and his only reason of living,The mother he loved more than his own life and to save her life, he lived in Forth's house a life worse than dogs,The mother refused to recognize him. Or he was more troubled by the fact that the father and family he had longed for all his life were Phana and Mr Kongthanin.

How could he accept the bitter and horrible truth that the older brother he had longed for his entire life and every day he secretly prayed to God for was Phana?. The Phana who always enjoyed seeing his suffering and helplessness and who was going to rape him.

Even if he ignored the fact that Phana enjoyed his pain and helplessness. But could he ever forget that Phana was going to rape him? if he had not had a chance to escape, Phana would have raped him.

The father who never showed his face even though he had no compulsion and beam spent his whole life listening to people, he is mix blood illegitimate, There was a time when beam felt that maybe he was really illegitimate.

Has he ever accept the man as his father who was alive even though beam spent all the life like an orphan. he spent a life of Do or Die.Where he spent every night of his childhood with his eyes open, fearing that if he closed his eyes something terrible would happen. Where people looked at a young abnormal woman and an innocent child with animal-like eyes as if they would tear not only their clothes but also their flesh. Where at every step beam had to save not only his own but also the dignity and innocence of his abnormal mother

Beam was sitting there crying with hiccups. Many feelings and emotions were stirring inside beam at the same time.

He was in unbearable pain but he didn't understand what was bothering him the most.

He sat in that position and cried for a long time. He was tired of crying. His eyes were red and swollen. His breathing was short and heavy. The constant crying caused severe pain in his temple. He was feeling tired in the veins of his brain more than his body.  He didn't have the strength to cry anymore but his tears were not ready to stop.

He was trying so hard to control his tears when the door to the room opened

Beam raised his head and looked at the door with swollen eyes. His mother and  Mr Kongthanin were standing at the door.

His mother looked at him with painful eyes. She ran to him and wrapped her both arms around him

Beam, who had been trying to control his tears for a long time, he brust into tears once again when he got his mother's loving arms.

"Mama ...hic... please don't forget me....hic... please mama I have no one but you... hic.... please don't forget me...hic..."  beam also tightly wrapped his hands around his mother and started painfully crying even worse than a newborn baby, There was immense pain and anguish in his sobs

"Sorry forgive me ...hic...  i made my beamie cry, I am a bad mother ...hic.. please forgive me" Miss jane said in teary voice

Mr Kongthanin looked at them. Pain was flowing down from Mr Kongthanin eyes in the form of tears, he didn't want to be any kind of disturbance between the mother and the son so he silently got out of the room

"No, you are not a bad mother ...hic...  You are the best mother in the world ...hic... I love you so much mama" beam tightened hug

"Mama also love her beamie so much ...hic...  Mama will never make this mistake again" Miss jane said in teary voice

They hugged and cried for a long time They did not try to silence each other, Maybe they wanted to lighten the burden of their hearts by crying

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