14: Lonely Room

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"Have you thought about harming yourself since arriving here?" Dr. Hemsworth asks plainly, her perfectly manicured hand pulling down her pristine skirt as she crosses her smooth cocoa-colored legs.

"I have. I think once you've considered it, the thought never leaves your mind. Like a backup plan. If things get too hard or too bad, I can always just end it all." Not seeing any reason to lie. I can't talk about the conversation with Janine, but I can talk about my feelings and maybe she can actually help me. Even if she isn't human, she is a psychologist, at least that's what the piece of paper hanging on her wall says.

"Have you made a plan?" She reads off her clipboard.

"No. Well sort of."

She perks up at this, looking up from her clipboard for more than a glance.

"Ambien wants to have a suicide pact." I admit. What's the worst they could do to her? Kill her? That's what she wants.

"I see. Well, I have to tell you it's impossible for two Nephilim to kill one another. The damage required is too extensive. One of you would just kill the other. That would not help your state of mind. It did not help hers. I shouldn't tell you this, but I think it's important for your safety. Ambien has made this pact before. Ambien survived and has to live with the guilt of killing her friend for the rest of her life." Dr. Hemsworth warns.

My heart aches in sorrow for Ambien.

"If Ambien seeks to put you through the same anguish, she endured perhaps she is not your friend." She adds.

I've grown to care for the petite psycho over the last couple days and feel an odd protective friendship with her. Dr. Hemsworth's words make me angry. Not at Ambien but at Dr. Hemsworth.

I'm up and out the door, disinterested in another word from the woman.

...

Group was weird without Kali. It was even weirder walking into our room and seeing the stripped bed she once occupied.

I grab my stuff and head to the shower. I'm not as tired today, so I let myself enjoy the hot water. The water beating my skin breaks my resolve. I'm not sure what it is but the flood gates open. It's a cathartic cry. A sobbing ugly indulgent wracking of tears. My eyes are puffy and my throat sore by the time I'm done.

I leave the shower but am in no hurry to get back to my lonely room. There are five rooms connected to the recreation area. One is mine, another is empty, the next is Miguel and Thomas, then there is Sasuke and lastly Ambien.

I tap her door, waiting for a response. When I receive none, I crack it open and peer inside.

Her small frame barely blemishes the surface of the bed. I deposit my shower stuff in the empty cupboard, realizing the other bed has no bedding. I didn't think this through. Ambien is so small there looks to be plenty of room on the twin size mattress.

I slide into the bed beside her, prepared for her to attack me, either because I startle her or because I am a weirdo, climbing into her bed.

She takes my arm and wraps it around her, shifting her backside closer to me. I guess she's a cuddler. That's fine by me. I could use a cuddle about now. I have never been much of a cuddler but that may be because I haven't had the opportunity.

She smells nice, like the soap from the shower and something else. I think it's lavender. I fall asleep quickly with the aid of the soothing sent of lavender.

Something is tickling my face. I half expect to find Ambien dangling a spider in my face. My eyes fly open at the thought.

Ambien is peering down at me, trailing her fingers delicately down my cheek, her large colorless eyes staring intently at her own action. She glides her fingers further down and over my lips. Her lids close partly as she stares at her fingers on my lips.

Lying in bed with her, with her caressing my lips, my body is responding. My heart is racing. Her tingling caresses turning to electricity that pools in my center. I want to kiss her, to do more than kiss her.

I roll out of the bed before I do something to embarrass myself. "Good morning." I shriek. Grabbing my things from the cupboard, I hustle out of the room stupidly.

I'm lucky not to get a cross bow in my ass. It's still early so I make it to my room unimpaled. I appreciate the loneliness of the room now. It's uncomplicated and safe. Safe as it can be in this place.

"How'd you sleep?" Sasuke asks when I plop myself and breakfast tray down beside him.

I stiffen at his question, guiltily. I glance at Ambien, my cheeks going pink. Ambien is preoccupied, attempting to balance cheerios atop one another. Watching her petite fingers work, I am reminded of the way they traced delicately along my cheek and over my lips.

Miguel starts coughing, choking on his breakfast. Miguel eyes me curiously, probably poking around in my mind again without my permission. My whole face is burning now.

"Good. Thank you." I reply, hoping to change the subject. Luckily, Janine comes in at that moment.

"Good morning, all. How did we sleep?" Not her too. She is surprisingly crossbow-less this morning.

"Good morning." Sasuke greets. Thomas appears to be in a catatonic state, pushing food around his tray with a blank stare.

"Dr. Hemsworth will be observing training today. She is evaluating your readiness for placement. This is mostly for you three gentlemen. Sorry Sara, you haven't been here long enough yet. This is your chance, Miguel. You have been here longer than anyone, other than Ambien. I wanna see some real effort today." A dark blade materializes in Janine's hand, with a flick of her wrist, it sinks into Thomas's chest.

"My heart is gone. You can't stab it." He groans, vanishing dramatically. Oh, jeez.

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Thank you for reading.

Is there romance in Ambien and Sara's future? (;

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