To Say These Words

Chapter Seven

Exhaustion prickled throughout her body, the sweat and tears were long dried, she now had some peace and quiet. However, relaxing was not possible when so many thoughts filled her mind.

She continued to keep her eyes shut, attempting to sleep. Her baby was in the nursery, for the time being, her family and friends had decided to get dinner - it was her chance to rest.

Rachel recalled the intense fluorescent lights, the doctors, and nurses surrounding her. She remembered the first cries of her baby echoing through the room. They had handed him to her after he was cleaned up. She was amazed that such a small person could have such a big effect on her. She wept as she soothed her baby's cries.

The disheartening part about this experience was the fact that her mother was by her side in the delivery room, not a man.

But, she refused to let having this baby by herself diminish the event. She was surrounded by her friends, who remained impatiently in the waiting room. They were people who had supported her throughout her entire pregnancy. Rachel chose to marvel at the fact that she was a mother. She had given birth to a beautiful baby mere hours ago, her son.

She was on the verge of sleeping. The darkness behind her closed eyelids swirled into a flashback. Mark had been on her mind all day; it wasn't surprising that he came into her mind's eye.

How could she forget the last time she saw Mark?

It was almost harder to say goodbye to Ross the second time around. As quickly as Ross had come, he had to leave. Rachel had Mark for support this time. He offered her a form of comfort as Rachel and her friends watched Ross board the plane.

It was a few days after Ross had initially spent the night at Monica and Rachel's apartment, after he and Rachel talked. She knew she had to tell Mark the truth; she had already shared her secret with all her friends, it was time for her to let him into the loop and face her fears.

"Do you want to come back to my place?" Mark whispered in her ear. Rachel tore her eyes away from staring after Ross, to look at Mark. She then peered around him to give Monica a word-filled gaze, telling her where she'd be. Monica understood Rachel's stare, nodding.

"Sure, let's go," Rachel answered. Mark took her hand in his as they proceeded towards the exit.

.....

"Do you want a glass of wine?" Mark asked seductively, as they entered his apartment door.

"Um, no, none for me," Rachel responded, her voice quivering slightly with nerves. Mark noticed her uneasiness immediately. After they took off their coats he stopped her in her tracks.

"Is everything okay?" He questioned, stepping closer to her. He leaned in, attempting to kiss her lips, but Rachel dodged his advance. Mark watched her with a confused stare as she marched to take a seat on his couch.

"I need to talk to you about something," Rachel admitted, anxious as the moment of truth rapidly approached. Her heart pounded fast, making her feel sick.

"What's up?" Mark inquired, lightheartedly. He plunked down beside her on the couch; he put a hand on her knee. Rachel placed her hand a top his, taking a deep breath.

"Mark, I-I'm pregnant," Rachel stated, looking him in the eyes.

A pang of sadness made her heart sink as she watched his reaction. He seemed to be distraught, shocked and panicked all at the same time. It was not the reaction Rachel was hoping for.

"And it's m-mine?" Mark questioned, pointing at his own chest with a shaking hand, withdrawing it from its position upon her leg.

"Well, yeah," Rachel confirmed, immediately becoming emotional.