Life between two worlds

14

That November evening was the final straw !

I refuse to believe what I have seen ! A biped talking wolf, what again ? Creatures in fairy tales my parents read me in the evening when I was a child exist ? In which world am I ? A weird one ! Is that boat a psychiatric hospital ? So, am I ill ? No ! I am in good shape...or not. I am boatsick, not seasick, boatsick, like we say "to be homesick".

I miss my family more and more each day, and it became unbearable ! I am on that boat for two months, it is enough ! Lessons are not interesting at all, almost. Seriously, I do not care about that world where a "magical" people lives ! What is the aim of knowing that ? It is so exaggerated ! Furthermore, everyone rejects me and I reject everyone (but that, I do not care, I like being alone and, anyway, nobody understands me).

What is the next step ? I do not really want to know, I will not stay here two more years. I have to go, quickly !

But before, I decide to take a bath to think about my escape plan.

By relaxing in the bath, I remember my fourteenth birthday, three days ago, the first of December : even if with the unimaginable distance between my family and I, my family comforted me once again by sending me presents which warmed my iced heart : philosophical tales, magazines explaining famous paintings, a scrapbooking kit, a Newton's cradle and a book of greek mythology creatures. I was touched by all these wonderful presents. However, I had a heartache to know my family and my best friend so far away from me...this thought makes me depressed and encourages me to leave that horrible boat.

I enjoy this long and pleasant moment before getting out of the bath. I put my pyjamas on and scans the room.

I gather my belongings into my schoolbag after having tidied my pseudo-bedroom.

After having scanned the room and checked the door of the bedroom and the bathroom are well locked, I close my schoolbag, put in on my shoulders, open the patio door and immediately close it after.

I tilt on the guardrail.

And then, I fail screaming !

Where is the ocean ? Better...where is the blue sea ?

Right in front of me, there is an ocean, but...it is a...sea of clouds ?! PARDON ?! A floating boat, like Peter Pan ?!

I...I...that is enough ! I am cheesed of those rubbish ! I will wake up ! I am in a nightmare, that is not possible ! Furthermore, I cannot see the ground ! The boat is floating at a great altitude !

I cannot manage to breathe, suddenly...I think I will have a panic attack ! All that hidden pressure has to leave ! There is only one way to stop all of that !

I want to go home, I want to see my family, my friend, my secondary school, I want to find my life again !

I do not regret what I leave behind me : a parallel world, which smells luxury everywhere, full of creatures dressed up as humans (or the contrary ?), a world challenging physics laws, where all is non-sens ! A real carnival !

I leave, really this time, to find people like me ! Fourteen years wandering here and there, everywhere and nowhere, my aim is searching and finding my place. I failed my mission, so there is one last thing to do.

All my life, I spread misfortune around me. I always felt rejected, by everyone. So, in return, I wished the devil to get my surrounding and destroy the world where I accidentally landed. Only my family and Axel are allowed to be saved, because they warmly welcomed me.

But now, hoping to see them again is weak. I do not know where I am, above that endless sea of clouds !

So, with my bag well put on my shoulders, I haul myself on my feet and take a last breath. Then, I close my eyes, stretch out my arms in cross, join my feet and lean, a large smile on my face.

Goodbye Mum, Dad, Ilios, my dear animals, all my family and Axel !

Let my mind and sould leave my body and find the place they were created, life between two worlds is impossible to me ! Now, I need a place I feel home, where I am accepted as I am, where my people has always waited for me !

I am nothing but a painful soul, dying and wandering endlessly and without aim, in the windings of eternal darkness, lying in the limbo of hell...