Another Love

XXIII. Caged Animal

Those had become a routine. Lucien would wake up, not being able to sleep, wander the halls and find Thorin either in the throne room or the treasure room and the bring him to bed. They woke up as if everything was normal and they weren't, in fact, sleeping next to each other almost every night. They spoke more during the nights, Thorin voicing his thoughts and memories of his family while Lucien told him of his travels and who he had met. It was nice, comforting and safe. But when the sun rose, Thorin was usually gone and back to his demanding self. Lucien couldn't win.

He also spoke to Bilbo more, making sure the secret was crushing him. A secret such as his was a hard one to keep when the person he was keeping it from was a good friend and the rightful owner.

Balin was his own personal therapist and Kili and Fili never left his sight. The three were inseparable it seemed nad no one was blaming them.

It had been almost been two weeks and Lucien was at his breaking point, he wanted to leave, he wanted to visit Dale. Lucien was the wandering wizard, not the wizard of Erebor, which now sounded much more fitting. When Lucien was put in one place his mind tended to go, searching for something different that his body could not find.

Dwalin had become much more bearable, even willing to have a decent conversation with the wizard. He sympathized, and although it wasn't very obvious, Lucien knew he was trying seeing as it was rather difficult for the warrior dwarf to show his emotions.

Lucien sat with the two prince brothers for breakfast as he did every morning, trying to put each other and everyone else in a better mood but this time was a little more serious.

"I'm just worried," Fili voiced his concerns, "If he is forcing you into this I-"

"He is not forcing me into anything, Fili. I can assure you." Lucien spoke calmly. He was not irritated, he was actually quite grateful, he just didn't want Thorin's nephews to think this way of the dwarf. Nothing was going, they just didn't believe the wizard.

"What about the ring?" Kili questioned with a frown.

"What about the ring?"

Kili and Fili looked at each other incredulously. "Well, that must mean something between you two. I mean, he gave you a ring."

"And it is just that. A ring. A promise. Yes, it means one thing but not the thing you are both hassling me about." The wizard sighed, "Look, I am fine. I know how to take care of myself. I have been alive for over forty thousand years for Eru's sake. Trust me."

The two huffed and nodded. "Fine. We will let it go. For now." Kili muttered, averting his eyes with annoyance towards his friend.

Then it was time for the pair to set off to work with the rest. Lucien was growing very sorry for them and felt beyond guilty for not being able to help if he did he would be sent to his room like a child. Now that was irritating.

Thorin and Lucien stood on their ledge, overlooking the working dwarves. They still hadn't found anything and the wizard was surprised Thorin had not snapped yet. If he wouldn't Lucien would, however.

"Thorin, I want to visit Dale." Lucien straightened his back and spoke strongly, no ounce of anxiety shown and that was true. He wasn't afraid.

He didn't speak for a moment but it was clear he wasn't happy. "And leave the mountain?"

"Well, that is how I would get there, yes."

The dwarf turned to face Lucien, expression hard as stone. "I will not allow it."

"Why not?" Lucien whined.

"Because you are to stay inside these walls, where I can see you, where I know you are safe."

"But I can protect myself, I've been doing it for centuries," The wizard crossed his arms with a huff, "Why do you feel the need to keep me safe and not the others as such?"

"You are a treasure I cannot afford to lose, Lucien." And although this did sound nice, something about it made it seem like there were two meanings. Lucien did not like that one bit.

"But that isn't fair."

Thorin grumbled, "Life isn't fair. You are not to leave these walls. Do you understand?!" His voice echoed, catching the attention of those below. They stared in pity and in hopelessness. The king's mind was made up.

Lucien jumped in surprise, his eyes flickering around the room as though not to catch those piercing blue ones. He was helpless, he felt as if there was nothing to be done. The sickness had now taken over and this was what was left of the great Thorin Oakenshield, the shell of a tyrant.

Finally, his black eyes found the ground beneath his feet, "Yes, your majesty." He uttered with shortness of breath.

That was the moment the company knew, they knew the wizard could never say no or go against the king. He was stuck, trapped and depressed. Lucien the green wandering wizard was a carefree spirit, going where he pleased and leaving magic to those he left. It was a whimsical type of magic that was happy and warm and naturally worn with pride. The green wizard was a legend and now he was a domesticated pet, doing as he was told or be punished. This wasn't right at all.

Lucien left before another word was said and found himself inside the room he found Thorin a few nights before. He kneeled in front of the throne, trying to find peace amongst the grandness of the hall.

He was a caged animal again and all he wanted was to be set free.