The girl with blonde hair

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What are the magic words I need to speak
to help her help me and of the answers that I seek
I look for her in every empty seat
The ghosting trail of thought that follows me
The only one , it sticks around
it sets up shop to my astound
how long does it plan to stay
Because i want it to be gone
The jumping impulse ruins my array
I feel the scramble in clinging surprise
I try but it defies overpowering everything Ive got
now, i can't have any other thought
they feel impure and dull if they aren't about love
I sleep and eat and live out my life in gray
and open my door to a world of black and white
I saw the gradient in her and awed at the sight
I think I may be wrong this time
though I've never been one to know how I feel
but I think it makes me glad
to think all the other times we could have had
Shameful, happy memories
I'm delusional 

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