Expectations

Nightmares

Picture above is Akira Raijin Dai's father.

I do not own Naruto it is owned by the goat Masashi Kishimoto.

Dai's age: 10

Rank:Genin

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                                                                               Dai's pov

    I layed down on the floor of my room looking at the ceiling. The floor felt cold but comforting, it was a weird sensation I didn't really understand why. I readjusted my hidden cloud headband. I didn't know what time it was or how long  I had been  laying there only thing I knew was that it was a good amount of time because I was pretty tired. Of course I could try to lay in my bed and fall asleep but I knew it was pointless, my thoughts were going to keep me up all night.  I just looked up in my room in the pitch dark.  At first I tried to think of nothing, just focus on my breathing. That didn't work though as only thing I could focus on was the one person I didn't want to. So I started thinking about the missions I went on with  my team. Still didn't work so I tried thinking about  killer bee and all the pranks we did  but every thought just kept going back to him. I had been doing so well for the past six months not thinking about  him but it was the  2nd year anniversary   so I knew today  I couldn't  just avoid it no matter how much I wanted. Yes tomorrow  was the anniversary of the day that I killed my father.

I heard the door open and my light get turned on but I didn't look up I knew who it was. I tried to act like I was sleep but my mom wasn't dumb.  I was expecting her to scold me for being on the floor instead of my bed but instead she just laid right beside me. I looked at her surprised and I seen she was looking up at the ceiling I decided to join her with the ceiling gazing. 

For awhile there was a comfortable silence as  neither of us spoke a word. We didn't need too we both knew what we were thinking about or at least who.  After a while my mom finally spoke up.

"Dai". I looked at her waiting for her to continue. "You and me  have the tendency to hold  things  in so people won't worry about us. Emotions can be  dangerous, if you hold them in for too long they'll explode and harm the people you love. It's better to open up to your love ones before that happens".

Deep down I knew she was right, she always was but I couldn't open up. I deserved to go through this suffering alone, I did it I killed him no matter how many time my mom tells me it wasn't my fault it didn't matter. 

I got up and tried to walk to the bathroom. I couldn't cry in front of my mom I had already gave her enough pain already. Before I could take two steps my mom hugged me swiftly. I tensed, I was used to her hugs but wasn't really expecting it especially so fast. I slowly relaxed and let me just stay in the comfort of my mom's arms. I felt a drop of water on my shoulder and knew it was my mom crying. It was weird she had never cried in front of me before even after dad died. She seperated and looked at me with determination in her eye. 

"It takes time and a lot of  love to heal deep wounds. No matter what words I say it's not going to magically stop you from hurting. I just want you to know that your father is with you always. You carry him wherever you go. Whatever you do, whatever ninja you become  your father will always be proud of you."  I looked down at the ground. I didn't want the words to help but they did. My mom had a way with words. I don't know if it's the wise words she spoke or how she said it but she could make the most evil people change their ways just by talking to them. I wonder if there was anyone else in this word that could do that.