Red vs Blue in the RWBY universe

An idiotic date.

Sarge: CABOOSE
He yells at Caboose, who is sleeping upside down. Caboose then yells and falls off the bed.

Caboose: AH, what is it Sargent are we under attack by the blues?
He yells still on the floor.

Grif: *sleepily* You are a blue Caboose.
He says half-asleep.

Tucker: *sleepily* If you know Caboose, you know he is more a danger to you the more friendly you are. I'm counting the days until he accidentally blows up Ruby... Bow Chicka Bow Wow.
He says slowly getting up.

Caboose: Ugh, I would never blow up Ruby! I think. Today. Maybe. No not really.
He says coming to his very few senses.

Sarge: Shut up Caboose, we need to get you into boyfriend material!
He says happily. As Tucker groans and goes back to sleep.

Caboose: OH YEAH! I have no idea how to do that.
He says honestly.

Sarge: That's what we're here for!

Tucker: Not me I'm not helping him when I still need one.

Grif: Sarge, do I honestly look like boyfriend material, or like I have and any experience in the matter.
He says sticking his belly out.

Sarge: *vomit* Good point, well that what I am here  for caboose.

He says to Caboose who just replies with "neat" and then they go to practice dating etiquette.

*Timeskip brought to you by Chibi Grif having a workout montage*

Sarge: Okay Caboose, I will be Ruby, and you will be... well, you.

Caboose: Okay, hello Ruby would you like to make Cookies?
He asks Sarge who replies in a freakishly high pitched voice.

Sarge: *imitating Ruby* Okay Caboose I cant wait to make Cookies with an amazing man such as you Caboose!
He says so high pitched that Velvet falls to the ground in pain covering her ears.

Caboose: *nonsense stuttering and awkward small talk* ... okay now how do we make cookies, I just eat them.

Sarge: *high pitch* Well you're the man, you need to know how to do stuff.
He says says as Caboose runs away to find a cook book.

Ruby: Hi Sarge! Do you know where Caboose is?
She says as Sarge jumps up, scared.

Sarge: *still high pitched* Jeez Ruby, did Caboose teach you how to teleport or something?

Ruby: No, and why is your voice so high?

Sarge *high* What? *lowers it while coughing* I mean, whatever are you talking about? I am a man and my voice is deep as a well.
He says proudly and awkwardly as Caboose turns the corner with a cook book.

Ruby: CABOOSE HI! What's that?
She yells as Caboose jumps up and throw the book at the window and Ruby looked at him confused.

Caboose: AH! Ruby, it was, uh, Tucker's book on how to seduce women... whatever that means.
He says cluelessly.

Ruby: I have no idea... ANYWAY LET'S GO MAKE COOKIES!
She yells enthusiastically jumping in the air.

Caboose: AH YES LETS DO THAT THING YOU JUST SAID YAY YELLING NOISES!

*Timeskip brought to you by chibi Tucker's book on how to seduce women*

Ruby and Caboose go to the kitchen with the supplies and ingredients, they started to make the cookies. Everything was going smoothly, with the exeption for a few explosions. Outside of the kitchen, Tucker and Yang were watching. Yang being happy for her sister, Tucker with his hand on a detonator, which Yang notices and punches him through a couple of walls.

Then Ruby and Caboose finished the batch oh cookies, and the both jumped on some clutches and started eating them, Caboose with his helmet on.

Ruby: Caboose why don't you just take your helmet off?
She asks confused as to why someone would eat with a helmet on.

Caboose: Oh I don't know how.

Ruby: What do you mean? Just lift it off.

Caboose: *Tries it* Nope doesn't work.

Ruby: What kind of armor is that?

Caboose: I have no idea...