ACT TWO, SCENE TWENTY EIGHT

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GROUPCHAT
SAGE IS OUR SUGAR MOMMY

regulus
if i ever, and i do mean EVER, see that type of pda between my brother and sage ever again, i will stick a knife into my skull

james
agreed

rowan
yup

charlotte
sage and sirius were literally undressing each other as they walked up the stairs in front of everyone
i am thoroughly disgusted

rowan
i really didn't want to know that sirius has a lion tattoo on his thigh
like, that was something i could've gone my entire life without seeing

maia
don't act like you lot haven't been ten times more disturbing when we were all drunk back at school

lily
fair point

charlotte
are the two lovebirds still asleep?

remus
i dunno
i'll go check
no they were not still sleeping
i interrupted something rather intimate

rowan
NOOOOOO
please tell me they weren't shagging

remus
i wish i could

sage
have we learned our lesson? that we should knock?

remus
definitely.
now i know what my boggart will be for the rest of my life

sirius
sorry, mate
maia, hopefully we gave your man some tips

maia
sirius, you disgust me

sage
sirius, you're a pervert
maia, you are a slag on the low so don't act so innocent

maia
sHUT UP

MAIA HAS LEFT THE CHAT!

SAGE HAS ADDED MAIA TO THE CHAT!

maia
let me rot in peace

sage
no
we're going swimming

lily
sagey darling it's freezing outside

sage
there's a pool in the house silly

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