You're My Blue » Lashton

Five5

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Five5

Luke. Luke. Luke

Luke was all Ashton thought about.

Things weren't going well ever since these three months has passed. It was close to impossible to forget about Luke, and to forget about how he made him feel.

Everything reminded Ashton of Luke.

Whenever he would pass by the little coffee shops where they would meet at for their dates, his thoughts were consumed of the blonde.

Whenever he passed by the small park where he had first bumped into Luke, he could only focus on how he instantly knew that the blonde beauty was different.

Whenever he would drive down the coast and see the glistening dark blue of the vicious ocean, he thought of the beautiful blue eyes that he adored.

Luke was the sole of his life, of his world, and of his whole universe. And now Luke wasn't there with him anymore.

Ashton knew that the people around him could tell that he was declining emotionally, hence him currently being surrounded by a group of people that "cared" about him in hopes of cheering him up. Of course Mary was by his side, which only made things worse.

He wished that Luke was by his side instead.

"You having fun?" She asked to his side, laughing when one of their friends said some cheesy joke about the club they were currently in for the night ahead.

"Yeah." He gave her a fake smile, but she bought it.

After she turned her attention back onto their group of friends, Ashton only huffed and looked out into the dark club that was only being slightly lighten up with flashing LED lights.

He hated all of this.

Yes, he should appreciate that he has so much things that other people wished with everything that they had.

He had a job, he had friends, he had a wife, and he was able to be out at a club during the night to have leisurely fun. But things just didn't seem to matter when Luke wasn't there to share it with him.

Ashton's eyes narrowed in both shock and in pain when he saw an all too familiar man that was across the club. His heart began beating too rapidly, and he felt his palms sweat.

Luke was there, and he had no idea that Ashton was there too with his hazel eyes placed precisely onto him.

"I'll be right back." Ashton told Mary with another fake smile, sliding out of the booth—thanking the universe that he was on the edge of it—before she could ask any questions.

Ashton didn't know what to say once he got to Luke, and he knew that he was being selfish once again. Luke was probably already over him and yet Ashton kept pettily running back to him.

Luke was in the middle of a conversation with some other man, making Ashton's heart break into even more smaller pieces. Was this his new boyfriend?

Ashton felt self-conscious as he let his eyes glide over this unknown man that was making Luke laugh out loud, noticing how attractive he was. He was definitely more attractive than Ashton was in his own eyes.

This man's tan skin was glistening underneath the bright, colorful lights and he had the brightest smile as he watched Luke laugh. Ashton was breaking even more from this.

He seemed to freeze once he was a few steps away from his ex. Ashton wanted to speak to him and just let out what he was feeling. He wanted to let out all his recent sorrow out to the other, like he always used to do in the past.

But he couldn't make those last steps to his Luke, to his blue. He couldn't be selfish anymore and he couldn't drag Luke through the mud alongside with him.

So he suddenly turned away with salty, blue tears steaming down his cheeks as he turned away from the blonde quickly. He rushed towards the men's restroom, going inside of the thankfully empty room and immediately letting out his sorrowful sobs of pain.

It felt like someone was constantly grabbing at his heart, crushing it tighter and tighter as time continued on. Time was supposed to heal wounds, but it seemed to be the complete opposite for Ashton. 

He was currently leaning against the bathroom's counter, looking into his reflection and seeing how much of a mess he was.

The sound of the door being opened and somebody walking through made Ashton quickly wipe his tears away with the sleeves of his shirt while taking in a deep breathe in order to get rid of the horrid sobbing.

"Why are you crying?" A soft voice asked, making Ashton slightly jump from the sudden question.

He looked forwards again into the mirror, seeing Luke standing by the now closed door. He shook his head and said, "No reason. Just...just go, Luke."

He didn't want Luke to see him like this. He didn't want Luke to see him in such pain.

"Something is wrong." Luke stated as he saw Ashton's disheveled state, "I saw you storming off across the club."

"It's stupid." Ashton sharply closed his eyes and gripped his hands onto the bathroom counter.

He expected for Luke to simply leave after this obvious message of him wanting to be left alone and in pain by himself. But instead he felt a gentle pair of arms wrap around his waist behind him alongside Luke's chin resting on his shoulder.

"N-No." Ashton shook his head and opened his eyes to meet Luke's blue ones through the reflection, "Your boyfriend is right outside."

"My boyfriend...?" Luke asked completely confused before realizing why Ashton was really so upset, "He's not my boyfriend. That's Calum. He's Michael's new boyfriend."

"Oh." Ashton said quietly, knowing that he was wrong about this situation. Michael was Luke's best friend, and so that meant this Calum man wasn't with Luke in the way Ashton thought he was.

"Yeah." Luke sighed out not really knowing what else to say about this.

"I should go." Ashton said, but he still kept his eyes passionately onto Luke's through the reflection of the mirror.

"Don't." Luke said simply as he also kept the eye contact, "Don't go. Talk to me."

"I can't." Ashton took in a deep breathe as he kept trying not to cry.

"Why not?"

"Because it's selfish, I'm selfish. It's not fair for you to see me like this. I'm so broken without you, Luke. But I just need to get over it."

"You're not selfish, Ash. You're just hurting...and so am I." Luke said honestly as he slowly turned Ashton around to face him, "I miss you."

"I miss you too." Ashton sniffled as he looked directly into those blues. He missed the color so much and now they were right in front of him once again.

"No, Ashton, I really miss you." Luke said both nervously and seriously, watching for Ashton's reaction to this.

This was wrong. Ashton was still married and this was still a secret if they were to do anything. Hypocrisy would be the only correct word to define whatever this was, but Ashton was wrapped up in the blue and Luke was wrapped up with who he felt like he was at home with.

And so Luke suddenly leaned in and connected his lips against Ashton's, letting their hearts guide them this time instead of their minds.