You're My Blue » Lashton

One1

☻♡

One1

Heartbreak is a devastating and saddening thing to going through.

Knowing that you love someone so much and that they love you, but there's just no way for your love to conquer all.

Luke couldn't be with Ashton. It wasn't right.

Society and marriage were powerful statements, and Luke couldn't face either of the issues. He knew that the guilt and the fear he felt everytime he was with Ashton was telling him to fix this.

So that's what he did. After one year and 2 months of sneaking around with Ashton, Luke broke up with the man he loved so dearly.

—•••—

"Please. Just let me talk to you about this."

"No, Ashton." Luke sighed out sadly as he tried to avoid any and all eye contact.

If he looked into those hazel eyes he'd just be reminded of all of the impossible moments they shared together.

So many things they shared all while Ashton looked into his blue eyes while Luke peered into his hazel eyes.

"I don't want this." Ashton begged with the pain obvious in his voice, desperate for Luke, "I only want you. You're all I need. You're all I  want."

Still looking to the ground, afraid and unable to face reality, Luke said, "Its not that simple, Ashton. I can't do this anymore. I can't sneak off with you and keep this is a huge secret."

"I'll fix it." Ashton nodded determinedly, trying to wipe his tears as a motion of a promise.

"How?" Luke asked saddened as he finally looked into the eyes of his troubled lover.

"I'll end it with Mary. I don't love her. I only want you." Ashton said softly as he slowly reached his hands out to hold Luke's.

And Luke was going to let him. He was so used to it—so used to Ashton—but he suddenly retracted his arms back just as Ashton was about to grab them.

"No." Luke stated with a shake to his head, "You're married to her, Ashton. For six years too."

"I love you." He tried while being obviously desperate and anxious, seeing how serious and troubled Luke actually was about this situation.

"I know." Luke tried so desperately to push back the feeling in his heart and chest that this was wrong. This shouldn't have been happening, but it was the only solution.

He wish things could be simple. He wished he could be with Ashton. But the reality of the world had another thing to say about it.

"It's over." Luke had to put all of his energy into not crying, "We're over."

"Luke, please." Ashton sobbed out, "I'll do anything for you, to have you. I'm begging you with everything that I have; please don't leave me."

"I'm sorry, Ashton." This is when Luke couldn't hold back his own tears or cries, "It just won't work."

"We can try." Ashton continued to push for his love.

Ashton couldn't lose Luke. It would crush him and it would crush his heart and soul. All he cared about was Luke and Luke's happiness.

Seeing him crying in front of him and being unable to even touch him or console him made Ashton feel terrible.

He just wanted them to be like they were before this. Before Luke started breaking from the guilt.

Ashton should have fixed this problem much earlier so it wouldn't of come down to him losing the one he truly cares about.

"We have tried. I've tried so hard, but I can't face this guilt anymore. Everytime I see you all I can think about is that I'm helping you cheat." Luke said honestly.

He can't ignore these feelings, no matter how hard he tries and no matter how much he really loves Ashton.

"Luke, I need you so bad. I know that I'm too co-dependent on you, but you complete me. I love you so much it's unreal. I can't lose that and I can't lose you." Ashton was so desperate now and he just needed Luke to see how much he truly loved him.

"This isn't easy for me either, Ashton. I do love you, but we both know that we can't keep doing this. It isn't right."

"Give me a few days and I'll talk to Mary. I'll end everything with her right now."

"No." Luke shook his head again, "Even if you do end it with her, this relationship was brought up by lies and sadness. I can't do it anymore."

Ashton saw the guilt in Luke's eyes. Luke was guilty that he was breaking Ashton's heart, but he was also guilty for destroying Mary's life.

Luke has never even met Ashton's wife and he didn't know if not meeting her made him feel more or less guilty.

Ashton and Mary have been having problems. They have been for a couple years now even before Luke and Ashton even met. The married couple simply fell out of love, but Ashton knew that it still didn't give him the right to sneak off behind her back.

But Luke was special to him. Luke was the love of his life, and he was losing him too.

"I need to go." Luke said softly as he stood up from Ashton's couch, grabbing his keys and phone, "Take care, Ashton."

"Luke..." Ashton was going to start his begging again, but when Luke looked back at him with those pained blue eyes, Ashton knew that he was being selfish and that he had to let him go no matter how much it hurt.

Ashton loved Luke. That's why he let go.