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ʚ minsung ɞ ✎ fluff + angst ✎ summary :: jisung is insecure about his body. ✎ 1233 words ✗warnings :: depression, self-harm, bullying, cussing, ✐ author's note :: sadder oneshot. by the way, if you still hate jisung but is a stay, then get the fuck out of this book and out of the fandom. its either you stan all eight of them, or you don't stan them at all. ❥jen •°. *࿐
jisung's thoughts were crazy. he thought he was fat. he thought that if he cut himself, he would loose weight. he thought if he stopped eating, he would loose weight. but no, it didn't help. jisung had scars all over his arms and stomach, and no one knew about it. they didn't know about any of it.
"jisung! it's time for breakfast!" jisung's mom said.
jisung trudged down the stairs, whining to his mom. "i'm not hungry!" the seventeen year old male whined.
jisung's mom sighed and handed jisung a ten dollar bill. "go pick up some food on your way to school," his mom said and jisung nodded, taking the money from his mom. "also, can you wake up your siblings for me? they need to eat breakfast too," jisung nodded again, going back upstairs to wake up his younger siblings.
jisung knew how exhausted his mom would usually be. i mean, his mom is a single mom that is raising three kids. jisung's dad cheated on his mom when jisung was six, so he was out of the teenaged boy's life. he felt bad for his youngest sister, she grew up without a father figure, so jisung would try his best to help the eleven year old with everything she needed. since jisung's mom was already so busy, the orange haired boy tried not to worry her with his problems. so, he hid everything from her.
once jisung woke up his two other siblings, he waved goodbye to his mom and started heading to school. he walked by many cafés and food shops, though he didn't enter any of them.
if i get food, i'll be fat, he thought as he ignored his rumbling stomach.
the orange haired boy arrived at school. shuffling feet and whisperings were heard as he walked by.
"hey fatty," a voiced said in front of jisung.
oh jungsoo, jisung's bully, was the one who caused most of this, he caused jisung to cut, he caused jisung to skip meals, he caused him to do every negative thing. jisung didn't reply to him, trying to walk away and ignore him.
"you really think you can escape me? huh, fatty?" jungsoo taunted, pulling the orange haired boy back towards him. jisung didn't answer him again, making the latter furious. "answer me, fatty!" he yelled.
"stop messing with him," a intimating voice said behind jisung.
jisung knew who the voice was. it was lee minho. he always stuck up for jisung for some reason.
"it looks like your prince shining armor is here," jungsoo snickered.
"i said, stop messing with him," minho growled, punching the black haired male in the face.
jungsoo's lip started bleeding, "you really think you can hit me like that? huh? you fucking cunt!"
jungsoo was about to hit minho with all his might but his fist was stopped. minho held onto the latter's write, slowly twisting it three-hundred sixty degrees. jungsoo cried in pain as he looked at minho, who had a cold expression on his face.
"let go, you bitch!" jungsoo yelled, but cried out in pain again as minho's grip tightened.
"let him go, minho," jisung mumbled.
minho listened, sending a death glare towards jungsoo again as the black hair male ran away.
"are you okay?" minho asked jisung. jisung nodded, getting up.
"why?" the younger asked.
minho looked at him confused, "what do you mean?"
"why do you always defend me?" the orange haired boy asked.
"because, i see you get bullied often, you have no friends and so i decided i wanted to help you," the eighteen year old male replied.
"so you take pity for me?" jisung asked.
"no, i just-"
"you take pity for me," jisung said coldly, walking away from the scene.
if only he could realize my feelings towards him,minho thought, smiling sadly and walked towards him class.
-
jisung cried in the school's bathroom, his sobs were muffled by his hand that was over his mouth. he calmed himself down as he fetched a blade from his backpack. he put the blade in there since his mom would always clean his room after the orange haired boy left to school. if she saw the blade, she'd be worried.
rolling up his sleeves, jisung pressed the blade against his scarred wrist, the orange haired boy glided the blade, making a cut. "one for being fat," cut. "one for being useless," cut, "one for being weak," cut, "one for being a bastard," cut, "one for being a-"
"stop," a voice said.
"minho? what are you doing- hey! give me it back!" jisung demanded as minho took away the blade from the younger.
"no, you're never going to get this back again," minho said bluntly, ignoring the younger's protests and whines. the younger gave up, sulking at the older, a pout clearly on his face. "lets go to the clinic to clean those cuts up now, yeah?" jisung shook his head, stilly sulky, but again, the older ignored the protest and dragged jisung towards the clinic, without touching his cuts.
"there, you're all cleaned up," minho said, putting away everything back into the first aid kit.
"you're still doing this because you take pity in me," jisung mumbled.
"han jisung, i don't do this because i take pity on you. i don't take pity on you, you want to know the real reason why i take care of you?" jisung nodded. "it's because, i-i.. i like you- no, love you!" minho exclaimed, feeling a bit awkward and shy.
"i-i, i'm sorry, i don't know anything about love," jisung said. now he was the one who was pitying minho. it was a well, a rejection.
minho gave the younger a determined look, "then i'll teach you and i promise to protect you."
-
a few years passed and minho kept his promise. he protected jisung from jungsoo and his other bullies. he even injured someone severely when he was protecting jisung. jisung, well, he felt safe whenever minho was with him. he felt butterflies in his stomach, his heart always beated faster than usual when he was with the older. minho also helped jisung with all his insecurities, he managed to convince the younger that he was perfect the way he was. he was able to convince jisung to eat. he helped jisung with everything.
"minmin?" jisung asked. they two non-official couple were cuddling at minho's house and were having a movie night.
the movie they chose, well, jisung chose, was frozen ii.
"yes sungie?" minho said as he looked down to see jisung snuggle in his chest.
"what's the symptoms of love again?" jisung asked.
"hm, well, your heart would beat fast, feel butterflies in your stomach, and risk it all when you're with a certain person or people," minho explained.
"minho?" jisung asked again.
"yes sungie?" the older replied.
"i think i love you," jisung said, feeling sleepy on minho's warmth.
minho smiled, feeling accomplished, "i love you too, sungie."
