Picture Perfect - Book 2 - Q.F.

Grilled Cheesus

Once again, Piper wasn't really paying attention to her surroundings, finishing another drawing, with Mercedes leaning against her as she watched her best friend working in silence.

"Mr. Shue?" Finn called, but neither of the girls bothered looking up at him when Mercedes pointed out something in Piper's drawing. "I have something to say. Something happened to me, and I can't really get into it, but it's shaken me to my core."

"Oh, my God, he's coming out." Puck said and, at that, Piper frowned, looking at Puck before watching as Finn stood up.

"Why, yes." Finn said, as Piper's frown just deepened and Mercedes lifted her head from her shoulder to look at Finn better. "There is a man who's sort of recently come into my life, and that man is Jesus Christ."

"That's way worse." Puck mumbled as Piper gasped.

"And I know there's others in here who dig him, too." He said, causing both Quinn and Mercedes to perk up in their seats. "And so I thought, maybe this week, we could pay tribute to him in music. You know, pay tribute to Jesus."

At that, Piper pouted, not in the least happy with that even though her best friend seemed to be. She wasn't the only one to have some type of objection, though, because, before she could say anything at all, Kurt spoke up.

"Sorry, hum, but if I wanted to sing about Jesus, I'd go to church." Kurt said, as Piper nodded. "And the reason I don't go to church is because most churches don't think very much of gay people."

"Or women." Piper interjected, causing Kurt to nod at her.

"Or science." He continued.

"I don't see anything wrong with getting a little church up in here." Mercedes disagreed with her best friends gently as they both exchanged a glance before Piper reached over to place a hand on her knee to let her know it was okay.

"I agree." Quinn nodded, sitting on Mercedes' other side. "I've had a really hard year, and I turned to God a lot for help. I, for one, wouldn't mind saying thanks."

"Thanks for what?" Santana scoffed. "That it didn't come out a lizard baby?"

"Whenever I pray, I fall asleep." Brittany mumbled, as Quinn sent Santana a glare.

"Well, guys, maybe our song selections don't have to be about Jesus." Mr. Schue said, deciding — this week — to actually listen to the children. Piper rolled her eyes then. "We could do songs about spirituality."

Someone else who didn't seem all that happy was Puck, however, and, noticing his dissatisfaction, Finn scowled at his friend.

"You got a problem with Jesus?" He challenged as his best friend shook his head and stood up.

"Oh, I got no problem with the guy. I'm a total Jew for Jesus. He's my number one Heb." Puck said as Piper shook her head, deciding paying this class any attention was pointless and choosing to look down at her drawing again. "What I don't like seeing is people using J-money to cramp everybody else's style, 'cause it seems to me that true spirituality or whatever you want to call it is about enjoying the life that you've been given. I mean, I see God every time I make out with a new chick."

"Okay, okay, that doesn't make any sense." Rachel scoffed. "In fact, it's stupid."

"Are you calling Mr. Billy Joel stupid?" Puck asked, as Piper rolled her eyes.

"What the hell is even happening?" She asked to no one in particular, feeling a bit lost during that conversation.

"At this time, I'd like to continue my streak of doing only songs by Jewish artists." Puck continued as he stood up and grabbed his guitar. "Hit it."