Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
___
𝑲𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒈𝒔𝒔𝒊𝒆𝒈𝒆
War victories
___
The war had been won.
Reiner was currently on a train on his way home to Liberio with the rest of the warriors. After four years of meaningless fighting for Marley. It was finally over. But Reiner couldn't say he was in the mood for celebration. Unlike many others, he liked the war. Not because of the killing and fighting, but because it gave him a sense of purpose, something he desperately needed after coming home from the island.
All his life there had been something he strived for. Back when he was still young and naïve, he had just wanted his mother to be happy. He just wanted a happy family.
That was what fueled him to become a warrior and what went on to ruin his life. He gave up his childhood, cut of his lifespan, and killed thousands of people. All because his mother just couldn't realize that the man who fathered him was an asshole.
He had given up everything, for him to be accepted as a marleyan, yet after serving the country for close to his entire life, he was still seen as a pest, just another eldian scum. And too late he realized that they would never accept him.
Not that he cared. He may have done it at some point in his life, but now... after he had lost everything he cared about, a little bit of discrimination didn't face him.
One good thing did make its way into his miserable life. That was Guinevere, she was the thing that kept him fighting, while in some twisted way also being the one thing that made him want to end it all.
If they had just lived under other circumstances, how great life would have been. If the both-of-them had been just normal marleyans or even eldians, shit he didn't even care if they had lived inside the walls. As long as they would have been together, in a place with no war or fighting.
Just them, maybe a small house, and a child or three. Thinking of it, gave him some form of bittersweet happiness. Hoping that the day he would leave this earth, some higher power would deem him worthy of another chance.
Another life, with nothing to worry about, just the two of them. She had been his sense of purpose back on the island, and now after this war she still was. She was the reason he wanted to die, yet the only thing that kept him alive.
Yes, the war had been good at keeping him distracted, but now old memories of her seemed to be making their way back into his head. Stirring a battle between the soldier and warrior in him.
A side of him wanted to keep fighting, to live on, and help the young warriors to not suffer the same fate he had. Gwen had always been quite motherly towards children, even if they weren't her own.
He would be lying if he said she hadn't rubbed a little off on him. Before he hadn't liked kids that much. Yeah, sure some of them were cute, but for the most part, they were just annoying.
Then he met her, and for the first time, the thought of having a child of his own sounded like something he could get behind.
Now when he looked at the young warriors, the thought would always pass his mind. He blamed her for the fatherly feelings he had towards those kids, he blamed her for wanting to keep going.
Still, she left him in this world alone. For that he didn't blame her, this world really was cruel. There was the part of him that had already given up, the part that just wanted to die. Leave this world for good, and maybe, just maybe he could meet her in another life.
The two parts of him had been in a constant battle, trying to just find the right thing to do. But why did it have to be this hard?
"REINER!"
He had been so caught up in his thoughts that he didn't notice someone trying to tell him something "yeah?" he asked "we're there in a few minutes" it was Pieck alerting him that they were getting off the train soon.
Pieck stayed back for a bit, asking if he was alright "I'm fine, just spaced out for a second there" he answered.
Reiner got up from his seat, taking the little belongings he had with him. He looked down at the red ribbon tied around his wrist making sure it was still tight.
It had become a habit of his, he was almost paranoid about losing the piece of fabric, since it was the only thing he had left of her.
The train came to a stop, and he got off with everyone else. Deep in thought, Reiner didn't seem to notice the blue-eyed blond getting off the train a few compartments down
___
I'm probably going to wait with publishing the next few chapters, because of manga spoilers. Not really sure though :/
