Bitter Like Black Coffee

6; Shut Up

You arrived back at your dorm about four hours after you left work, only because Yachi made you stay and eat some dinner before you left. The dorm looked the same as when you left it a few days ago, but with more trash and dirty laundry laying around. There was no arguing, the dorm was a mess. Setting your bag of dirty clothes down by the door, you sighed and headed straight to cleaning.

Just you and the silence of the room with the occasional crunch from a piece of garbage you picked up was heard. You took this time before the other two got back to think about how you would talk to them.

You were still pissed at how touchy and flirty that girl was with them. The way her long nails trailed over Iwaizumi's bicep slowly. How Oikawa looked at her without a care in the world. How Iwaizumi admired everything she said. It's what you wanted to have but you couldn't. You knew they cared about you a lot, but you would never be close to them and their probable girlfriend.

You came up with a small conclusion in your head. You would try and talk to them. Keep the feelings there but talk. Tell them why you had left. Tell them that you were happy for them. And probably ask them who that girl was? You didn't know how it was going to play out. You just wish you could see into the future. Or time travel! That would be cool, to be able to avoid this conversation if you skipped ahead or just went back and took this properly.

The click of the door being unlocked and the two voices of Iwaizumi and Oikawa alerted you that, obviously they were home. You took a deep breath and came out from the bathroom, nervous to see them.

The taller of the two let out a faint gasp and launched himself towards you, bringing you in for a hug. It took you a bit to return the hug. The both of you pulled away, and you looked over at a shocked Iwaizumi standing behind Oikawa. You cleared your throat, "um, can we talk? We should probably talk."

The two of them nodded and you all sat on your bed.

"Um, I just want to say I'm sorry for the way I reacted. I shouldn't have done that over a silly little relationship. I shouldn't have run off with zero explanation. I'm really happy for you two! I really am, it was just shocking you know?" You sniffled a bit, trying to hold back some already welling up tears.

Oikawa moved over a bit so he could sit closer to you, "hey look, it's okay. You had every right to be mad, especially since you're our best friend and all of these people knew before you. And on top of that, it was for over a month. And neither of us had said anything."

You groaned and sat up more, "but still! I should've at least let you all speak! Not make it worse by running off and not responding to anything you guys sent me. I just overreacted."

"Stop saying stuff to make it seem like it was your fault y/n." Iwaizumi sternly shut you up before you could go on again. "It was our fault for not telling one of the closest friends to us what was happening. That's final. This bit is our fault."

You wiped your eyes with your sleeve and sniffled again. You took a few breaths and popped a question. "Who was that girl? At the cafe?"

You felt Oikawa stiffen next to you. "She's a girl from our class, don't worry about her, no one important." Oikawa's nervous response and smile were enough to let you know, he was probably lying again.

"Bullshit!" You raised your voice, the other two getting startled. "It didn't look like she was no one! It was pretty obvious you all were really close. The way she holds onto Iwaizumi like he's hers." Iwaizumi cringed at the missing nickname you gave him.

"The way Oikawa looks at her with so much fucking care and love makes me think that 'oh! He probably likes her too!' Better yet! I just realized that I overheard a conversation you were having with the others one time! What was it? How you two were willing to share this nice and hot girl? Is that her?"

The couple looked at you shocked. Did you hear that? The two of them looked over and realized that this was a much deeper rabbit hole they were stuck in than they thought. "Y/n! Stop! Why are you acting like this? You just told us you were happy for us!" Iwaizumi sat up straight as well, his instinct to try and stand his ground showing.

"Because from what Oikawa says that she's nothing, it really seems like she's something to you two! And if I tie everything together correctly, it just means you guys lied to me again! And it fucking hurts because I'm not her okay! She's gorgeous, obviously smart, and from everything Kiyoko was able to tell me, she's fucking amazing! I see why you two would like her. It's a pain in the ass because I want to be in her place! I'm jealous okay?"

"It's hard seeing her be all touchy and kind and sweet with you two when I want to be there! Look, I don't know if she's your guys' girlfriend or not, and I don't judge. But I wish I was! Look, I wasn't planning on telling you guys any of this but I might as well!"

Both of them opened their mouths to try and interrupt you, but you were speaking way too fast.

"I love you guys so much. I mean it. I've loved you guys for about two and a half years now. I've always wanted to yell at at least one of you, but I felt bad because I loved the other just as much! So I kept it to myself! I didn't know what to do! I didn't want to be seen as weird, so I said nothing. But now it sucks even more because someone else gets to be in the position I wanted to be in! I want to be able to do all of the relationship stuff with you two! I just want you two! So fucking bad!"

You were standing on the side of the bed at this point. Your breathing was ragged and tears flowed with no sign of stopping. You opened your mouth to speak again, but getting stopped by a loud sob. Speaking was supposed to be done for now, but you didn't agree. You took a deep breath and got ready for another ramble.
"Y/n please shut up and let us speak!"